Sunday, April 12, 2015

Warming Up Sunday



Sunday morning, the day of rest where one can re - charge ones batteries. This morning Mary Lou & AmyLynn are going to the grocery store. Our fridge is almost empty to my ladies are going to fill up the darn thing for me to cook. They both enjoy my cooking. Today is the final day for the Masters. It's going to be a burn burner. I hope that young Speith can hold on to win but there some fantastic golfers behind him.  Tonight Al & Meilin are once again visiting , pool, tea & goodies.I better be careful, I might start gaining some weight. 

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Sunday's Funnies



Outhouse Joke

A man gathered all of his children together and said “Children when George Washington knocked down the cherry tree, he told his father honestly that it was him , now answer me honestly, Who knocked down the outhouse? Finally the youngest son admitted it was him, at which he received a lashing he wouldn’t soon forget. “That's not fair” complained the son, “George Washington didn’t get punished when he told the truth.”
“Son” replied the Father “The difference is, that George Washington’s  father wasn’t in the tree when he knocked it down!”




The Tricky Wife Joke

A lady was walking down the street when she was a approached by a lady beggar asking for money. The lady took a $20 bill out of her purse, and asked “if I give you this money will you spend it on chocolate.” “Don’t be ridiculous” the beggar replied “does it look like I have nothing better to spend money on?” “How about shopping?” she asked. “No,” the beggar said, “don’t you understand I need money just to stay alive.” “Will you spend it on your hair?” the lady asked. Annoyed the beggar replied, “No, I just need money for food, and shelter. “In that case” the lady said “I don’t want to just give you money I would like you to eat out with me and my husband tonight.”
“Why?” The beggar asked. “Well,”the lady said “I think it’s important for him to see what a lady looks like after she gives up chocolate, shopping, and hair appointments.”



An 85 Year-Old Man Was Requested By His Doctor To Have A Sperm Count

An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor to have a sperm count as part of his physical exam.
The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."
The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.
The doctor asked what happened and the man explained:
"Well, doc, it's like this --- first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.
Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.
We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too. First with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees but still nothing."
The doctor was shocked and said, "You asked your neighbor?"
The old man replied, "Yep, none of us could get the darn jar open."

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Sunday's Poem


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Past Cruise Photos

                                        St. Lucia, one of our first ports on our first cruise 2007
                                                                The Island of St. Kitt

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I think I'm finished for the day but there is one one thing to do............................................................

                                                                          SEE YA.




A wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified to find her husband in bed with a lovely young woman. Just as the wife was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words:

"Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about."

So he continued: "Driving along the highway, I saw this young woman looking tired and bedraggled, so I brought her home and made her a meal from the roast beef you had forgotten in refrigerator. She had only some worn sandals on her feet, so I gave her a pair of good shoes you had discarded because they had gone out of style. She was cold so I gave her a sweater I bought you for your birthday that you never wore because the color did not suit you. Her pants were worn out so I gave her a pair of yours that were perfectly good but too small for you now. Then when she was about to leave the house she paused and asked, "Is there anything else your wife doesn't use any more?"
- See more at: http://www.bestfunnystories.com/2014/09/home-from-shopping-trip.html#more

11 comments:

  1. Bwahahahahahahahaha on the jokes. I linked you to Silly Sunday again.

    We are heading back to our marina sometime this morning. Having breakfast out first. Right now I'm having a great cup of coffee.

    Have a fabulous Silly Sunday my friend. :)

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    1. I hope that you, Zane and your company had a great time this weekend. See ya Sandee.

      Cruisin Paul

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  2. LOL @ the jokes hahaha! I do enjoy your photos :-)

    Enjoy the golf and your evening Paul :-)

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    1. Hey there Stevebethere. I enjoy spending some time on your blog. I'm glad that you are able to check on mine. See ya.

      Cruisin Paul

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  3. Couldn't get the jar open. LOL. Loved all of your jokes today, Paul - especially that one. Thank you for the excellent laugh and I hope you have a wonderful day! :)

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    1. You know Marcia, there are times that I'm not able to open my jars either. Ha,ha,ha. See ya.

      Cruisin Paul

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  4. A great post filled with inspiration and laughs. Thank you, Paul. :)

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    1. Since I've begun my blog the inspiration section are the ones that help the most. See ya.

      Cruisin Paul

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  5. Thanks for the giggles.

    Big hugs, honey...

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    1. Giggle, giggle, giggle. See ya

      Cruisin Paul

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Thanks for commenting!