Sunday, May 31, 2015

Rain, Rain, Rain, Rain & More Rain Sunday


It's so wet this morning even the birds and squirrels aren't even out. Good rainy Sunday morning friends. It started raining yesterday afternoon and it hasn't stopped since. In Michigan  there are flood warnings out. Over there they get all kinds of trouble. I think where I live, Amherstburg, Ontario, Canada, we get storms but not terrible storms but in Michigan you'll always see terrible pictures on the TV having tornados, floods, and whatever. I'm so happy to live where I do. 

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Three unmarried men were waiting to tee off when the starter walked up to them and said, "You see that beautiful blonde practicing her putting?"

"Her? Wow, she is beautiful," they all said.

"She's a good golfer," he continued, "and would like to hook up with a group. None of the other groups will play with a wom- an. Can she play with you? She won't hold you up, I promise." They looked at each other and said, "Sure! She can join us." Just as the starter said, the woman played well and kept up. Plus, they kept noticing, she was very attractive.

When they reached the 18th hole, she said that if she sank her 18-footer, she'd break 80 for the first time. "Guys, I'm so excited about breaking 80 that I have to tell you something. I had a great time playing with you. I can tell you all really love golf. I want you to know that I'm single and want to marry a man who loves golf as much as I do. If one of you guys can read this putt correctly and I make it, I'll marry whichever of you was right!"

All three jumped at the opportunity. The first one looked over the putt and said, "I see it breaking 10 inches left to right." The second looked it over from all sides and said, "No, I see it breaking eight inches right to left."

The third man looked at the woman, looked at the ball, and said, "Pick it up. It's good!"


As a couple approaches the altar, the groom tells his wife-to-be, "Honey, I've got something to confess: I'm a golf nut, and every chance I get, I'll be playing golf!"

"Since we're being honest," replies the bride, "I have to tell you that I'm a hooker."

The groom replies, "That's okay, honey. You just need to learn to keep your head down and your left arm straight!" 


Ten years on a deserted island

A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he thinks, "It's not a raft." Then, out of the surf comes this gorgeous blonde woman, wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She comes up to the guy and says, "How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"

"Ten years!", he says.

She reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes.

He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag, and says, "Man, oh man! Is that good!"

Then she asked, "How long has it been since you've had a drink of whiskey?"

He replies, "Ten years!"

She reaches over, unzips her waterproof pocket on her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and gives it to him.

He takes a long swig and says, "Wow, that's fantastic!"

Then she starts unzipping a longer zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit and she says to him, "And how long has it been since you've had some real fun?"

And the man replies, "Wow! Don't tell me that you've got golf clubs in there!"



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Past Cruise Photos

 


















                                                    Leaving Curacao going to next port.

    On the last night of our cruise, our steward placed this on our bed. He was thoughtful man and cared about us throughout our cruise.

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Guess what? It's still raining and from what the weatherman said, it's going to continue throughout the entire day. I guess I'll be inside for the day. I've already made our dinner for today so I guess I'll just have to watch some TV. Poor me. Ha,ha,ha. 
Have an enjoyable but wet day my friends and one other thing to say...........................................


                                                                               SEE YA !


7 comments:

  1. I loved the quotes, the poetry, and your pictures.
    Raining here today also, but yesterday was a very lovely day:)
    Enjoy the rest of Sunday☺

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  2. I'll have to get out a map and see where you live compared to where I live here in Michigan. We've gotten a lot of rain where I live but so far I'm out of the flood zones...that wasn't the case a few years ago when I ended up with four inches of water in my basement. Now, the rain makes me nervous. Still, our Michigan floods are nothing compared to what they get in Texas. People die in their floods and lose houses.

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  3. Wow, that's a lot of rain. We'll take all you don't want. Gladly.

    Loved all the jokes especially the hooker one. They are both going to be busy.

    I linked you to Silly Sunday as always.

    Have a fabulous day my friend. ☺

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  4. We are getting the high humidity here, I am hoping for some rain, Paul. Thanks again for sharing the laughter and inspiration.

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  5. LOL @ the jokes

    Been raining here too ...no change there then :-)

    What a great gesture from your steward how thoughtful

    Have a drytastic day :-)

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  6. In winter here in New Zealand it goes from pouring rain and storms and generally just crappy weather to sunshine every few days :) Never know what you'll wake up to! Love those animal towels the stewards do I remember once we were on a cruise and got a turtle one night.

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  7. Hooker...hahaha. We are getting more rain today...yuck.

    Big hugs, honey...

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Thanks for commenting!