Monday, July 20, 2015

Beautiful, Wonderful Monday

Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful sight. The sun is bright today, no clouds in the sky and no rain in sight. I use to hate Monday's but no longer. I looked out of my window and I saw a very beautiful blonde passing by with her shaggy dog and  didn't stop to leave a gift, the dog not the girl. Ha,ha,ha..
Last night I had a very enjoyable night playing pool. You know, some nights I can play so great but other nights, it's like I was just starting to play a new game. Oh well. It's fun just to be able to enjoy playing the game.

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Washroom

There's this guy on an airplane and he needs to do his business. The men's washroom was occupied so he asks one of the stewardess if he can use the ladies washroom. She was unsure but let him in anyways. She told him not to touch anything in there, and he said okay.
So he's sitting on the toilet and there are these three buttons. He pushes this first button that has an S on it. Then sprinkles of water sprinkle his bottom. Then he pushes the second button that has a P on it. Then powder powders his bottom. Then there's this third button that says ATR. He pushes that button and then he blacks out. He wakes up in the hospital and hes very confused. He asks the doctor what happened to him. The stewardess comes in and says you pushed the  AUTOMATIC TAMPON REMOVER. OUCH!




Toilet Joke...


A man walks into a toilet store and asks the manager, "Can I buy a toilet?"
The manager says, "Of course, we have three, a wooden toilet, a metal toilet, and a singing toilet."
The man replies, "I'll take the wooden toilet."
Later, another man walks in and says to the manager, "Sir, I'd like to buy a toilet."
The manager replies, we have two left: a metal toilet and a singing toilet."
The man says, "I'll take the metal toilet."
Later, another man walks in and says, "Sir, I'd like to buy a toilet."
The manager says, "Sorry but we have one left and it is a singing toilet."
The man says, "I'll take it."
Later, all three of the previous men who bought toilets are back.
The first one says, "Sir, I do not like this toilet because every time I sit, I get splinters in my butt."
The second says, "Sir, I don't like this toilet because it makes my balls too cold."
And the third guy says, "Yeah? Well I don't like my toilet because every time I sit down it sings, Do You See What I See?"


A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately.
When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard, which is full and bushy.
'Are you the manager?' she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.
'Actually, no,' he replies.
'Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him,' she says, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.
'I'm afraid I can't,' breathes the barman, clearly aroused. 'Is there anything I can do?'
‘Yes there is. I need you to give him a message,' she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them. 'Tell him,' she says, 'that there is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies' toilet.'
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Past Cruise Photos









                    This what you see when you wake up in the morning on a cruise. Beautiful.


                                     Prometheus Pool / Bar in the stern of the Carnival Valor.

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Well that's it for Monday. Have an enjoyable day friends and we'll see you later. 


                                                                                SEE YA.




 

4 comments:

  1. The bathroom rules for men made me smile, and your photos are gorgeous. Lovely inspiration, too!

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  2. Well here there's no sun just hot sticky and humid arrghh!

    LOL @ the jokes especially the singing toilet I would love that one just to see peoples faces after they have used it, I do have a fart fan hanging up in my loo it can be useful especially when the batteries are quite new :-)

    Love the photos that's quite a pose heheh!

    Have a tanfastic day Paul :-)


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  3. I'm glad you're having a beautiful day and I'm guessing it's not going to be as hot. That's even better.

    Loved all the potty humor. I love how you theme your jokes.

    Have a fabulous day my friend, ☺

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  4. Sunshine here in our world...and plenty of toilet paper!

    Big hugs, honey...

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Thanks for commenting!