Monday, August 3, 2015

Rain / Sun Monday


Good morning friends. We had an exciting night once I got in bad. No it's not that exciting night that you may be thinking about. I'm talking about a storm, heavy winds, thunder, lightning and anything else. I heard my deck chairs flying around during the storm and this morning they were everywhere. On the deck, outside the deck, on the grass. What a storm but this morning just calm. 
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How to Get Into Heaven

A man dies and met St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Peter says to the man, "Here's how it works. You need to have one hundred points to get into heaven. You tell me about all the good things you've done. They are all worth a certain number of points. If your total is one hundred or more, you can come in."
"Well," says the man. "I was happily married to the same woman for 52 years. I never looked at another woman. I was attentive and loved her dearly."
"That's great," says St. Peter. "That will be two points."
"Hmmm," says the man. "This is going to be harder than I thought. Well, I attended church regularly, volunteered my time and tithed faithfully."
"Wonderful," says St. Peter, "That's worth another point."
"One point!" says the man. "Okay, okay. I was involved with a prison ministry for twenty-five years. I went into the prison, at least monthly, and shared Jesus with them."
"Wow!" says St. Peter. "That's another two points!"
"Only two points!" says the man. "At this rate, it'll be only by the grace of God that  I'll ever get into this place."
"Bingo!" says St. Peter. "That's one hundred points! Come on in."

 A blonde was filling out a form for college. One question asked her to state her church preference. Her response: "red brick"
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A blonde got into heaven, and when she arrived at the Golden Gates, she was asked one question: "What is God's name?" She replied, "Andy."

"Andy? Why Andy?", she was asked.

She replied, "Oh, you know, 'Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, Andy tells me I am his own.'



  How Many Chickens  


   
        Two blondes are walking down a road, one has a large sports bag.
      
      1st blonde: "What have you got in that bag?"
      
      2nd blonde: "Chickens."
      
      1st blonde: "If I can guess how many chickens you've got in that bag, can I have one of them?"
      
      2nd blonde: "If you can guess how many chickens I've got in this bag, you can have BOTH of them!!"
      
      1st blonde: Well, I think you've got three."


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Past Cruise Photos








                                                   WOW! The U.S. Coast Guard in Bonaire.

                             Having a morning coffee on our balcony in the Carnival Liberty.

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Well that's it for this Monday. You all have a fantastic day and enjoy the sun with the cool breeze.

                                                                               SEE YA.

 

 

6 comments:

  1. Loved the snarky cat so I linked you to Awww Mondays. Just saying.

    I'm having my morning coffee too. It's good.

    Loved all the jokes as always.

    Remember tomorrow is the Story Game featuring you and Mary Lou. We want it to be romantic.

    Have a fabulous day my friend. ☺

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  2. That sounded like some storm we have loads of wet weather on it;s way here (nothing new there then)

    Loved the blonde jokes heheh! & the photos :-)

    Have a wettastic day Paul :-)

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  3. wow- what a night with all the weather! Enjoyed all your jokes-have a grrrreat day!

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  4. Oh,what a night! Hmmm, who sang that? It's now going on in my head.

    Beautiful here in the N GA Alps. Life is good...for both all of us.

    Big hugs, honey...

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  5. Lovely photos, Paul, great inspiration and good laughs. The cat with the poem made me laugh the hardest today. :)

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  6. I love black coffee and all the jokes especially the cat with its butt turning blue! That is a sweet Rose poem for your wife. Have a lovely day, Paul!

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Thanks for commenting!