Wednesday, April 27, 2016

COLD, A VERY COLD WEDNESDAY


Hi there everyone. It's April 27th and last night it went down to 32 degrees. Can you believe it and the highest it will be is 51? Crazy. I hope it gets warmer because I'm going golfing on Friday, April 28th. Dear God.
This morning looking out in my backyard I saw two beautiful ducks trying to figure out, How did we get in to this yard. Later in the morning, I going to visit my Uncle Rocco. He's 86 years old and the only only one of my father's family. He's a very important person to me. After my father died, ( 16 years ago ) Uncle Rocco was the one who I went to to discuss things about problems I had. This Sunday, he and my aunt will be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.  That will be 50 years during their celebration dinner that I took a bread roll and while cutting the roll, I also cut between my fingers. What blood and I had to be to taken to have stitches to close the opening. I went back to the celebration but I wasn't feeling well. We all remember that one and can laugh about now.

                                     ------------------------------------------------------------------

 








"Mommy, where do babies come from?"


"Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mommy sighs, knowing this day would come so she sits her daughter down for a long talk about the birds and the bees. After Mommy has told her little girl all about the making of babies, the little girl is now silent for a while.

"You understand it now?" Mommy asks.

"Yes," replies her daughter.

"Do you still have any questions?"

"Yes, how about little kittens, how does that work?"

"In exactly the same way as with babies."

"Wow," the girl exclaims, "my daddy can do ANYTHING!"
 
 

Sleeping Arraignments


When a family moved into their new house, a visiting relative asked the little five-year-old how he liked the new place.

"It's terrific," he said. "I have my own room, my brother has his own room, and my sister has her own room. But poor mom is still sleeping with dad."
 
 

Rosebuds and Hanging Baskets

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with a very shear blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just pitched a fit, telling her not to go out like that!

The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You gotta let your rose buds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes downstairs and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate....

The grandmother says. "Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show off your rosebuds, then I can display my hanging baskets."

Happy Gardening.
 
Oh how I love Granny! A very smart woman.

Why We Love Children!


On Nudity

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'
 

More Nudity

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'
 
                         ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
" SEE YA MY FRIENDS "















My first cruise 2007

6 comments:

  1. Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt. Bwahahahahahahahahahaha. Kids.

    Sounds like a nasty cut when you cut yourself. Yikes.

    I hope it gets warmer for you soon. That's way too cold.

    Have a fabulous day Paul. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sorry to read that it's got cold again there arrgh! it's till cold here too.
    I enjoyed your little story although that cut didn't sound too pleasant, I always find that ducks drive me quackers :-)

    Loved the jokes especially the hanging baskets LOLOL

    Hope you had a great day with your uncle :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's back to fall already here, Paul. Hope you get your golf in before the rain hits.

    You've got some great bumper crop of jokes today. I especially love the 'dad can do anything' and the blue jeans underpants.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Such funny stories! Thanks for the many giggles.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey, I still like sharing the bedroom with my guy (most nights). Loved the funnies. Hope you get some warm weather back.

    Big hugs, honey...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Have a great Sunday Paul & thanks for cruisin by :-)

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting!