Thursday, August 31, 2017

Thursday With Sun

Good morning friends, good morning. It's bad watching what has taken place in Texas. We always watch on the TV when things happen on the other side of the world but now the same things happens on this side. It's scary. I wonder if Trump can understand about climate change. Every thing is changing in our world. I worry that some country is going to blow up the world. I'd like to see my grandchildren have chance to grow up and enjoy their lives.
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Screwing up a Business

A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer.

"Certainly, sir, that'll be 1 cent."

"ONE CENT!" exclaimed the guy, the barman replied "Yes."

So the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks "Could I have a nice juicy T-Bone steak, with chips, peas, and a fried egg?"

"Certainly sir,"replies the bartender, but all that comes to real money."

"How much money?" inquires the guy. "4 cents", he replies.

"FOUR cents!" exclaims the guy. "Where's the Guy who owns this place?"

The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife."

The guy says, "What's he doing with your wife?"

The bartender replies, "Same as what I'm doing to his business." 




Drunk Man and a Priest
 

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"

"My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man."

"Well, I'll be damned," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.

"I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does." 


 George the Mailman


It was George the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.
When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family who roundly and soundly congratulated him and sent him on his way with a tidy gift envelope.

At the second house, they presented him with a box of fine cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful blonde woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door and up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced!
When he had enough, they went downstairs where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.
"All of this was just too wonderful for words."

He said, "But what's the dollar for"?

"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you, and he said, "Screw him. Give him a dollar." "The breakfast was my idea!!" 



Blonde Cowboy

The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blonde cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and his boots, so he arrests him for indecent exposure.

As he is locking him up, he asks "Why in the world are you walking around like this?"

The Cowboy says, "Well it's like this Sheriff . I was in the bar down the road and this pretty little red head asks me to go out to her motor home with her. So I did. We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt... so I did. Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants so I did. Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts ...so I did.

Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of sexy and says, 'Now go to town cowboy... '.

"And here I am."  


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I was going to continue but I thought I'd better keep some of my jokes for another day.
Have a wonderful Thursday my friends.


                                 " SEE YA "
                         ------------------------


                             " Cruisin Paul " 

13 comments:

  1. "She saved a fish from drowning." --- so cute!

    Trump will only acknowledge global warming if he can figure out a way to make money off from the concept. The Pope says, "We need to hear what the earth is telling us." I am proud of the current Pope and I'm not even Catholic.

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  2. I am Catholic and I love this new pope. I do agree with you Jean. Trump only does things that will assist him and not the US. That's why I worry about the US and Canada.

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  3. I won't do President Trump bashing. ☺

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  4. Sorry Sandee if I offended you with my comments about President Trump.

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  5. For anyone who does not believe the climate is changing, my response is to simply say that we need to take care of this planet anyway. If the person asks why, i note that taking care of our beautiful garden of a planet was the first commandment the Good Lord gave us, and we are doing a lousy job. Most people then agree.

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    1. I wonder if God is sitting up their wondering if he made the right decision making us. Their are fantastic people and yet there are stupid people in our world. I just hope that the right people are controlling the world. See ya Mimi.

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  6. The world will keep serving up warnings until you notice. Houston is a pretty significant warning. And, I think I want some food and a beer from that bar.

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    1. Rhonda,the warnings have been given to the world already and they aren't listening. I'm worried that it will be to late.

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  7. I have been trying to comment for the last couple days and it just won't let me so I have deleted your cookies from my browser to see if that works.

    I think climate is changing I have noticed it here we get more floods now than ever now on the scale of Texas though that was awful.

    I laughed at your jokes as always LOL @ "That's me in the black" one.

    Well if this comment don't work I will meet you under the umbrella Pauleo LOL

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  8. Hoorayyy that worked I can see it above now have a nice day Pauleo Panini :-)

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  9. Hooray Steveo! I was getting worried about you. Now I can rest my friend.

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  10. Thank you for our birthday cards. They were in the mail yesterday afternoon. They were most appreciated.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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Thanks for commenting!