Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Tuesday, A Day After Eclipse.

Good morning wonderful friends. My last blog it was raining and guess what? It's raining this morning. 
The other day, Friday morning, my friend Gerry came over and asked me if I wanted to play golf next Friday. Of course my answer was YES, so I'm playing Friday. I went and picked up some new golf balls, Calliway golf balls, pink golf balls
New and Improved, like me. Next month I'll be calling St. Michael's Hospital in Toronto to set another time to come in and have more tests. That is what the doctor wants so guess what? I will have to call the hotel again for two nights and MaryLou will need to go to the train station to get our tickets. What a pain. Oh well.

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A man goes into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man's face. "What did you do that for?" the man asks.
"Well, you don't have the hiccups anymore, do you?"
The man says, "No, but my wife out in the car still does!"

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A doctor is to give a speech at the local AMA dinner. He jots down notes for his speech. Unfortunately, when he stands in front of his colleagues later that night, he finds that he can't read his notes. So he asks, "Is there a pharmacist in the house?"



A young man goes into a drugstore to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants.

"Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's "the" night. We're having dinner with her parents, and then we're going out. And I've got a feeling I'm gonna get lucky after that. Once she's had me, she'll want me all the time, so you'd better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves.
Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person." He leans over to her and whispers, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."



A man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condom, then walks
out of the store laughing hysterically. The pharmacist
thinks this is weird, but hey, there’s no law
preventing weird people from buying condoms. Who
knows, maybe it’s a good thing.

The next day, the same man comes back to the store,
purchases yet another condom, and once again he leaves
the store laughing wildly. This piques the interest of
the pharmacist. “What could be so funny about
buying a condom, anyway?” So he tells his clerk “If
this guy ever comes back, I want you to follow him to
see where he goes.” Sure enough, the next day the same
man is back, he buys the condom, and again starts
cracking up with laughter, then leaves. The
pharmacist tells his clerk, go follow the guy. About
an hour later, the clerk comes back to the store.
“Did you follow him? Where did he go?” asks the
pharmacist.
The clerk replies “Your house.”


Blonde Deodorant
A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks a technician for some bottom deodorant. The tech, confused, explains to the woman that there’s no such thing as bottom deodorant.
The blonde assures the technician that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis and would like some more.
“I’m sorry,” the tech tells her, “but we just don’t have any.”
“But I always get it here,” the blonde replies.
“Do you have the container it comes in?” the technician asks.
“Yes,” says the blonde. “It’s right here.”
She reaches into her purse and hands a container to the technician, who looks at it and says to her, “This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant.”
Annoyed, the blonde snatches it back and reads aloud from the container: “To apply, push up bottom.”


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That's about it for me now. I hope that you enjoy the jokes. I did.


                                " SEE YA " 
                         --------------------  


                         " Cruisin Paul "
 

10 comments:

  1. Love all the jokes. As always. Especially the young man that is going to get lucky with the pharmacists daughter. That was my favorite.

    Have a fabulous day, Paul. ☺

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    Replies
    1. I wonder how that girl's father thinks? ha,ha,ha. Thanks Sandee.

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  2. The date with the pharmacist's daughter was my favorite too.

    Can't believe you have to go back for more tests!

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    Replies
    1. Yes Jean, I have to back to Toronto. Oh well. Thanks for stopping by my friend.

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  3. It's not fair to have to go back for more tests. Meanwhile, i am glad you are continuing to tell jokes and play golf.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mimi, I think that's the best way to enjoy life. Laugh and enjoy golfing. Thanks my friend.

      Delete
  4. Sounds like London rain rain rain and guess what dark skies and drizzling today too haha!

    Once your tests are done and out the way you will be glad and it will be all worth the bother.

    I hope your enjoying your pink balls Pauleo...oooh pardon!

    LOL @ the jokes what a mixture Viagra, deodorant up bottom, condoms and an a salt LMAO

    Have a laughtastic day :-)

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  5. Thanks for stopping in Steveo. I agree, I'll be very happy after all the tests are done. See ya.

    ReplyDelete
  6. If the doctor wants you to do more test, then it is better to follow doctor's instruction to check that everything is well with you. Have a great day!

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  7. The pharmacist is getting a lot of business today.

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Thanks for commenting!