Wednesday, September 6, 2017

Wednesday, Away From Any Hurricane

Good morning friends from all over the world. Silly me, from all over the world. I was I did have friends from all over the world but I'm very happy having those of you that do read this crazy blog. Good morning, good morning. 
Isn't it crazy about all of these vicious hurricanes. I worry about all of those people and their homes and their lives. God be with them.
This weekend my granddaughter Emily rode in many horse showa and she did very well. Here is a photo of her after she received her ribbons on the first day called Equestrian Riding.
She won 2 firsts, a third and fourth and won overall ride. The second day she won a first and fourth. Congratulations Emily. This is a very proud grandfather.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all die. In order to get into heaven though, they must go up 100

steps, each containing a joke. The trick is that they must not laugh.


makes it to the seventh step before she laughs.

Finally, it’s the blondes turn. She gets all the way to the 99th step before she laughs. God asks her,

“You were so close, why did you laugh?” and she responds, “I just got the first joke!”



A blonde walked into a shoe shop and saw a pair of shoes made from alligator skin that she liked.
“How much for these shoes?” – she asked the store manager.
“$200” – he replied.
“That’s too expensive! Can’t you bring the price down?” – the blonde.
The store manager said he couldn’t, and got irratated when the blonde persisted.
Finally after arguing with her for awhile he said, “There’s a pond with alligators behind the store! Why don’t you kill an alligator and get your alligator shoes free?!” – he yelled.
“Fine. I will.” – the blonde replied.
After an hour, the manager got a bit worried that the blonde might have come to harm with the alligators. He decided to go out and check on her.
When he arrived at the pond, he saw the blonde lugging a dead alligator and flinging it on the ground next to 6 other dead ones.
Before he could ask what she was doing, she wailed “Oh my gosh! This one doesn’t have any shoes either!”



A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, “PULL OVER!”
“NO!” the blonde yelled back, “IT’S A SCARF!”

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Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed?
A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.




One day a blonde felt like being a rebel, so she decided that she would drink and drive.
She found a cop car in the parking lot of a donut shop, so she started to drive around, circling the cop car.
After about 10 minutes of driving round and round she got fed up, so she parked the car, got out and walked over to the cop car, looked at the cop and said, “Aren’t you going to arrest me?”
The cop asked, “why?”
She replied, “Cause I was drinking and driving!”
The cop looked at her in bewilderment and answered, “We can’t arrest you if you’re driving while drinking… water!”

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A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
“Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.”
 



The blonde sat down ready to take her math exam. She knew she would cheat since she had the smartest kid in her grade sitting beside her. She copied his whole test page by page. Feeling confident in her answers she gets up and gives her paper to the teacher.
She stands there waiting for the teacher to respond in amazment. The teacher went through the test and said, “I know you cheated. You copied Jim’s paper including his name.”
 
 
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That's it for today. I have to go now because my printer is out of color and my daughter needs something for her. She has informed me that I better get it as soon as possible. Ohhhhh, I'm scared. Ha,ha,ha. 
 
                             " SEE YA "
 
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                     " Cruisin Paul "



10 comments:

  1. "No, it's a scarf!" That's so funny and I love the lion photo.

    Your granddaughter must be quite the accomplished rider. You have a right to be a proud grandfather.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Jean, I'm very proud of Emily. She's a hard worker.

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  2. Drinking and driving. Bless her heart.

    I stole your graphic about thinking it's Friday and it's only Wednesday. I posted it on Facebook.

    Hubby had a wonderful birthday yesterday.

    Have a fabulous day, Paul. ☺

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sandee my friend, you can steal anything from any graphic any time. I'm glad that Zane had a wonderful birthday and now Sandee, it's yours. Have a fantastic birthday.

      Delete
  3. We are all concerned for Florida and the East Coast. Harvey didn't do a lot of damage around our area.

    Drinking and driving, Heeheehee!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I agree it's quite frightening what is happening and the people losing everything, we don't have those extremes in the UK not yet anyway.

    A big congratulations to Emily on her wins she looks like she is over the moon :-)

    LOL @ the jokes I could never eat 12 pizza pieces either, and I hope that bloke realises what the doggy position she meant :-)

    Have a tanfastic day and I hope you managed to get the ink Pauleo LOL :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Steveo, Emily was excited. As far as 12 pieces of pizza, I did it many, many, many years ago. I enjoyed it. I know what the doggy position is.

      Delete
  5. Congratulations to your grand daughter for all the great accomplishments! Ha ha..the blondes are so funny!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting!