Saturday, September 29, 2018

Sunny, Cool, Saturday

Good wonderful Saturday morning everyone. I went golfing yesterday and I enjoyed it but coming off the 16 th green an walking to the cart I fell hard on my left side. I was able to complete the match but this morning I'm very sore. It's hard breathing. When I fell I didn't hear a crack so I didn't break a rib or ribs but just very sore. As I said it is hard breathing. I'm trying not to sneeze. Oh well, I'll probably continue falling. Rick & Gerry were so scared I had to calm them down. LOL. I told Rick that that was my birthday fall because on Monday I turn to 69 years old. That got him laughing and me. 69, I made it.



This is the Cayman Island, Georgetown. Unfortunately they don't a pier and people have to be tendered from their ships. It's a pain but the only way if you want to go onto the island.



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Little Margaret was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, Margaret, who created the universe?" When Margaret didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
“God Almighty!" shouted Margaret and the Nun said "Very good" and Margaret fell back asleep.
A while later the Nun asked Margaret, "Who is our Lord and Savior?"
But, Margaret didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, little Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Margaret and the Nun said, "Very Good" and Margaret fell back asleep.
Then the Nun asked Margaret a third question: "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" Again Johnny came to the rescue.
This time Margaret jumped up and shouted, "If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!"
The Nun fainted.


Three nuns passed away and when they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter was there to greet them. St. Peter said to the nuns "Before you can enter you each have to answer one question correctly."

So, St. Peter goes to the first nun and asked "Who was the first man God had created".

The first nun looked at St. Peter and said "Oh, that's easy, Adam"..

The trumpets sounded, the gates open and St. Peter said "You may enter".

Then St. Peter goes to the second nun and asked "Who was the first woman God had created".

The second nun looks at St. Peter and said "Oh, that's easy, Eve".

The trumpets sounded, the gates open and St. Peter said "You may enter".

Then St. Peter goes to the third nun and asked "What were the first words Eve said to Adam".

The third woman starts thinking then looked at St. Peter and said "Oh, that's a hard one".

The trumpets sounded, the gates open and St. Peter said "You may enter"..



An older couple had a son, who was still living with them. The parents were a little worried, as the son was still unable to decide about his career path, so they decided to do a small test.

They took a ten-dollar bill, a Bible, and a bottle of whiskey, and put them on the front hall table. Then they hid, hoping he would think they weren't at home.

The father told the mother, "If he takes the money, he will be a businessman; if he takes the Bible, he will be a priest; but if he takes the bottle of whiskey, I'm afraid our son will be a drunkard."

So the parents took their place in the nearby closet and waited nervously, peeping through the keyhole they saw their son arrive home.

He saw the note they had left, saying they'd be home later. Then, he took the 10-dollar bill, looked at it against the light, and slid it in his pocket. After that, he took the Bible, flicked through it, and took it also. Finally, he grabbed the bottle, opened it, and took an appreciative whiff to be assured of the quality, then he left for his room carrying all the three items.

The father slapped his forehead, and said, "Damn! It's even worse than I ever imagined..."

"What do you mean?" his wife inquired.

"He's gonna be a politician." the father replied.




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Well that's about it for today my friends If any one of you are Catholic and are upset about this just remember that I'm Catholic and I can laugh being a Catholic.Boy can I laugh.

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                                   " SEE YA "


Cruisin Paul
 

7 comments:

  1. Heeheehee! Great community service work, oillelujah!

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  2. Damn OUCH! sorry to read about your fall Pauleo but at least you didn't break anything.

    Aery happy birthday for tomorrow Pauleo don't eat too much cake and don't blow the candles out too hard because of your injury :-)

    I laughed at your jokes especially That's a hard one" joke LOL

    Im catholic Pauleo and the jokes are all in fun heheh

    Have a good Sunday and hope your feeling a bit better, keep resting :-)

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    Replies
    1. Oh my my God? You and I are both Catholic. Look out priests, two men are coming out for you. LOL See ya.

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  3. Thank goodness you are not seriously hurt or with broken bones except for the soreness. That is a very colourful pier!

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  4. I'm still very sore and hard breathing but I'll live Nancy. Cayman Islands have a small pier for small boats not the large ships.

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  5. I hope you are better by now. That is some great church humour today. I like the one with the girl using the pin on the boy.

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Thanks for commenting!