Friday, December 8, 2017

Cold, Snowy Friday

Good morning everyone. I've decided to continue with my type of blog having some laughter in it. I may not have has much as I had before but I need that laughter myself. I'll be adding at times , things about cruising or cruising ships. I hope that those of you who do check in with me will still enjoy it.

                              Naughty Santa

What A Boy Wants For ChristmasFunny Adult Christmas Jokes

David remembers accompanying his father out shopping in the toy department of Macy's one Christmas Eve.
Dad said, 'What a marvellous train set. I'll buy it.'
The girl behind the counter looked pleased and murmured, 'Great, I'm sure your son will really love it.'
Dad replied with a glint in his eye, 'Maybe you're right.  In that case I'll take two.'

What A Girl Wants For Christmas

The Santa Claus at the shopping mall was very surprised when a Emily, young lady aged about 20 years old walked up and sat on his lap.  Now, we all know that Santa doesn't usually take requests from adults, but she smiled very nicely at him, so he asked her, 'What do you want for Christmas?'
'Something for my mother, please,' replied Emily sweetly.
'Something for your mother? Well, that's very loving and thoughtful of you,' smiled Santa. 'What do would you like me to bring her?'
Without turning a hair Emily answered quickly, 'A son-in-law.'

 I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me "Nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace" So I bought her nothing.

Entering  Heaven
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes  Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's glasses.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "They're Carol's."

A Sign of the Times

As a little girl climbed onto Santa's lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?"
The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: "Didn't you get my E-mail?"




That will be about it for today.

  " SEE YA "


" Cruisin Paul " 

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Bright Sunny Sunday

Good morning, good morning, goooood morning friends. I was planning to do my blog as I do with some laughter photos between some jokes but after reading my friend Sandee's blog she told us that after today there will be no more funny jokes. You know I started thinking, it's been difficult finding funny things especially when I read the news going on in the world and especially with what's been going on in the US. I just want to cry and if this going to continue my country Canada is going to affected. My dollar is down to about 78 cents and I read that if NAFTA is going to fall, my dollar would go down to 60 cents. That would kill my cruising. So I don't feel like laughing this morning. I'll put it the photos that I planned to put in but I'm going to have to think about what I want in my blog. 


                       That's it for today. 

                                    " SEE YA "

                        " Cruisin Paul "

I have to have at least one joke. Here it is.

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.” 

Now I feel better. See ya