Wednesday, December 30, 2020

Happy New Year 2021

Well my friends, in another day we will say good bye to 2020, the worst year of our life. Last January I was on my cruise and when I arrived home later that month we all found out about Covid-19. Our world and I mean the entire world was sick. Many people became sick and many, many of friends and relatives died from this dangerous sickness. 

My hope & prays will be that covid will be a thing of the past. 2021 will be much better for all of us. January 1st will give us a new future.







Cruisin Paul


 

Saturday, December 26, 2020

A Very Snowy Saturday

Well I hope that you all have enjoyed a wonderful Christmas. We did and now we are approaching the end of the worst year we've every had 2020. I hope that 2021 gives a much better year.


 

Beaten By A Woman In An Elevator

I was beaten by a woman in an elevator today. I was staring at her breast then she said “Would you
please press one”, I thought she was talking about her breast.

 

Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ."
Kid 1: "As if."
Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."
Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."  

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A man is lying on the beach, wearing nothing but a cap over his crotch. A woman passing by remarks, "If you were any sort of a gentleman, you would lift your hat to a lady." He replies, "If you were any sort of a sexy lady, the hat would lift by itself." 

 

A man boards a plane with six kids. After they get settled in their seats, a woman sitting across the aisle leans over to him and asks, "Are all of those kids yours?" He replies, "No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."  


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Cruisin Paul


 




Wednesday, December 23, 2020

To All My Friends

Well my friends and all of those around the world, it's time to rest and pray for the birth of the our Lord Jesus. We have had a very difficult year. Covid has taken away some our family members and friends around the world. I pray that next year will be much better. 

                    Merry Christmas

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                             Buon Natale

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Cruisin Paul
 

Saturday, December 19, 2020

Snowy Saturday

Good morning everyone. After my last blog, all of you made me feel so good, proud knowing that being a person in this world is so great. I may never meet any of you but I do believe  that we are friends. Thank you all.

Now since I've been showing some Christmas pictures with Santa Claus, I thought that I would also include pictures for my Jewish friends around the world.



Why did the boy put his Hanukkah money in the freezer?

He wanted cold hard cash.

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My mother once gave me two sweaters for Hanukkah.

The next time we visited, I made sure to wear one. As we entered her home, instead of the expected smile, she said, “Aaron, what’s the matter? You didn’t like the other one?”

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During the first day of Hanukkah, two elderly Jewish men were sitting in a wonderful deli frequented almost exclusively by Jews in New York City. They were talking amongst themselves in Yiddish.

A Chinese waiter, who’d only been in New York for a year, came up and in fluent Yiddish with a perfect accent asked them if everything was okay and if they were enjoying the holiday.

The Jewish men were dumbfounded. “Where did he ever learn such perfect Yiddish?” they asked each other.

After they paid the bill they asked the restaurant manager, an old friend of theirs, “Where did your waiter learn to speak such fantastic Yiddish?”

The manager looked around and leaned in so no one else could hear and said, “Shhhh…. He thinks we’re teaching him English.”

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Admiring the Christmas trees displayed in his neighbour’s windows one year, Nathan asks his father, “Daddy, can we have a Hanukkah Tree?”

“What? No, of course not,” answers his father.

“Why not?” asks Nathan.

Bewildered, his father replies, “Well, Nathan, because the last time we had dealings with a lighted bush, we spent 40 years in the wilderness.”

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                         To All Of My Friends

Cruisin Paul


 


Wednesday, December 16, 2020

Wednesday Evening

Good evening friends especially those who have stayed with me. Unfortunately It seems that I've lost a few bloggers because in my Facebook I happened to thank my American friends and their new president Biden. I guess I wasn't suppose to do that because I'm a Canadian. It seems that I have to rights to say things like that. Oh well, it's not my loss. I'm 71 years old and I'll do what I want just like them. 



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I punched the mall Santa Clause in the face

He called my daughter a 'ho'. 3 times!
 
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Why is Santa Claus so jolly?

He knows where all the naughty women live.
 
 
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A treasure chest falls down from an airplane: Mickey Mouse, Santa Claus, a corrupt politician and an honest politician all run to the place where it lands. Who gets the treasure?

The corrupt politician, because all the others are fictional characters.
 
 
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Why is santa Claus a man?

Because no women will wear the same dress every year!
 
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Who is never hungry at Christmas?
The turkey – he’s always stuffed.
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Cruisin Paul



 

Wednesday, December 9, 2020

Christmas Is Coming

Good morning friends. The home is decorated for Christmas. The tree is up and decorated, the fireplace mantle is finished and the entire house is covered with Christmas things. I'm feeling better except for this Covid threat. Usually at this time I'm preparing for my cruise. Not this year. It has been cancelled. Oh well.

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Santa comes down a chimney one Christmas Eve and to his surprise finds a gorgeous brunette waiting for him, wearing the sexiest lingerie imaginable.

“Santa,” she purrs, “Can you stay for a while?”

Santa says, “Ho, ho ho! I’ve gotta go! Have to deliver toys to children, you know!”

She comes close, starts playing with his beard, whispers in his ear, “Santa, don’t you have a gift you would like to give me?”

Santa says, “Ho, ho, ho! I’ve gotta go! Have to spread Christmas cheer, you know!”

The brunette takes off her straps, giving Santa a view of her breasts and says, “Santa, are you sure there’s no gift you’d like to leave?”

Santa says, “Hey hey hey, might as well stay. I can’t get up the chimney this way!”

 


 


 

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

“In honor of this holy season,” Saint Peter said, “You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.”

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. “It represents a candle”, he said.

“Very well, you may pass through the pearly gates,” Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, “They’re bells.”

Saint Peter said, “You may also pass through the pearly gates.”

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women’s panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, “And just what do those symbolize?”

The man replied, “These are Carol’s.”

 


 


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Cruisin Paul


 

                   

Thursday, December 3, 2020

Very Cold Thursday But No SNOW

Good Afternoon Friends. The upstairs area of the home has been cleaned  and decorated for Christmas. I've shown you the main floor of the new home and I'll show you some other sections and the basement area next.

First my new friend Trippin Tim said that all I needed was a large TV. Well Tim, there are three TV's in our home, the two downstairs are 56 inch TV and my TV in my sitting area is a 70 inch so Tim here is a photo of my TV.


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 Here is my garage and across the street a home of my friend, my old neighbor in Pointe West who lived next to me for 31 years and now he lives right across from me. I'm so happy to know that Ron is my neighbor again.


 That's Ron's home.


 
              The garage still has a great deal of material because I have to wait until for Spring to buils my shed.


 Now we are moving to the front door and going down the stairs to the basement.


 These are the only stairs that I have to go down and I have two banisters to grab on to.


We had the builders complete the entire basement because of my daughter but also enjoy the pool table.



Unfortunately there are still many boxes with things from the other home so please forgive me with the mess.


AmyLynn has decorated the room for Christmas the way she wants.


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     This is the downstairs bathroom. This one larger the my room. 

 


and this is my computer room.


 

 That's it. My entire new home. Not as large as our older home was, about half the size but I'm finding it homely now.

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Cruisin Paul