Saturday, January 29, 2022

Big Snowstorm Coming

It's Saturday and I'm happy. Good morning friends. How are you doing this morning? Snow is still on the ground and the weatherman informed us that next week Wednesday & Thursday we should expect a big snowstorm. So what. I'm not going any place except in side my home. I'm going nuts. I want Spring to come soon. 

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 Never catch snowflakes on your tongue

until all the birds have gone south for the winter.

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Maria had 3 children, snowflake, sand & brick.

One day snowflake goes to her mom and asks, " Mom, why am I called Snowflake." The mother replies, " because when you were born, a snowflake fell on your head."

The next day Sand goes asks , why am I called Sand and her replies because a small grain of sand fell on your head.

The next day Brick goes to his mother and asks her the same question .  ksjndk jnkk dnvn  bhjbsn.

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Friends are like snowflakes.

They will disappear if you pee on them. 

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Women are like snowflakes,

Every one I touch suddenly disappears without a trace. 

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Cruisin Paul


 



 


Wednesday, January 26, 2022

Ice, Ice Baby

Good morning to all once again. I thank all my blogger friends to spend the time to comment on my blog. It means a lot and I was able to learn a great deal from you. 

Yesterday was my youngest daughter's birthday, AmyLynn. I was thinking to tell her age but after what people have expressed to me I/m not going to put her age. I'm just going to say that I'm 72 years old. Oh my goodness. From my head up I feel very young but from my neck down, well lets just say that I know why I need a walker now. LOL 

It's still cold outside and the snow is staying for awhile.

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 I wish I could even do this today. I use to be a referee in hockey when I was younger. No longer. 

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 I once tried ice skating on a lake, but I fell in. Nobody helped me either, they just laughed at me in panic.

Worsst summer vacation ever. 

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The thing about ice skating.........

No matter how good you are, the hardest part is always your nipples. 

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My rich neighbor just had a private ice rick built!

I said to him " Can I have a go?" and he said " Yeah, but it'll cost a dollar. "

T thought: " What a cheap skate . " 

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What is the hardest art about ice skating?

Telling your parents that you are Gay.

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An  English, Scottish and Irish man are being sent to prison for life

But the judge says as a small act of kindness you can each take one item to prison with you to make it a little more bearable.

In  Prison they show each other what they got.

The Englishman “I got these  fine cigars so I can spend the evening smoking and thinking.

 
The Scottish man “I got this  Fine Scotch whisky  so at the end of evening I can drink to the day.

 
The Irishman “I got this  Box of tampons

The other two “Why??”

 The Irishman said " Because it says on the box  with these I can go swimming, Ice skating and play sports.

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Cruisin Paul


 


 

        


 


Saturday, January 22, 2022

Finally, We're Getting Some Snow. Flurries.

Good morning all my good friends, Peg, Carol, Mimi, Nancy & Steveo. I thought I would mention your names because you are very important to me. I had two others but they thought being  political was  more important being  a friend.  You know, I wonder what can I say  that doesn't bother people. There is so much going on in our world , Covid especially, why must people get mad over some silly thing. My friend who is over 80 and he lost his wife recently. That's the guy that loves my Camero. He and I would go for coffee and I took him in my car. He would smile at his wife and she saw how excited he was in the Camero. Now she's gone but he still wants to go in my Camero and why, because he smiles and remembers her when he left. A little thing like that is big. When it gets warmer, he & I will go for coffee and he'll get that ride in the Camero.

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 Window & winter!!!!

 During a cold winter day a wife messaged to her husband that " the windows frozen". Her husband replied to pour some warm water on them. After a while the husband received a message again " No way she said, the computer is spoiled  now you jerk".

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Did  you hear about the big winter storm in New York?

It got so cold that bankers were walking around with their hands in their pockets. 

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 Finally my Winter fat is gone

Now I have  Spring rolls.

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A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
 
Moral of the story
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
 
2. Not everyone who gets your out of shit is your friend.
 
3. And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut. 
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Cruisin Paul



 



 
 


 

Monday, January 17, 2022

Good evening friends. I had to erase my last blog due to an unfortunate situation. It hurt a very close person that I love and since that I decided to erase the entire blog. You know, when I began my blog I wanted to inform, see photos of myself ( Maybe cruising ), jokes, and laughs but I never put my blog where someone would get hurt. It bothered me so much when I found out that I almost decided to give up my blog. I thought I only have 6 or 7 wonderful blogger friends that keep close to my blog and they in turn leave a word or two about what I wrote. I call them friends. I didn't realize that I probably had others reading but wouldn't comment or leave their names.. I guess I'd better smarten up or realize that my words could be used against me. I plan on continuing my blog but I'm going to be a smarter person when I write my blog. 

Now lets get on with some cartoons, memes and jokes.

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A short nap once in awhile can prevent old age.

Especially while driving. 

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A woman returns to her room in the old age home to find another old lady with her hand inside her husband pants. 

She's furious: " What does she have that I don't? "  Parkinson " answers her husband.

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 What's the difference between old age and someone that designs cannabis braclets?

With one you'll find the doobie bangles.

With the other you'll find the booby dangles 

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An elderly Norweigian named lars decided to march to the alter at the ripe old age of 85 with a shapely miss with big boobs who was only 25.

His friends cautioned him about the health hazard involved saying that the exertion of amour could prove to be fatal. 

" Vell dat's the chance I'll have to take. " said Lars. If she dies.......she dies. "

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  The secret to having a smoking hot body in old age.

                            Cremation............

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Cruisin Paul