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When you are in Hospital, your friends ask - “Hey, how are you dear?”
But your best friend ask - “Hey buddy, how is the nurse?”
Paul and his best friend were coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed his friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
Paul's friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
But your best friend ask - “Hey buddy, how is the nurse?”
Paul and his best friend were coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed his friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
Paul's friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
A friend asked a gentleman how it is that he never married?
Replied the gentleman, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman ... I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl."
"Oh, come on now," said the friend, "Surely you have met at least on girl that you wanted to marry."
"Yes, there was one girl .. once. I guess she was the one perfect girl.
The only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything .. I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me."
"Well, why didn't you marry her," asked the friend.
"She was looking for the perfect man," he said.
Replied the gentleman, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman ... I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl."
"Oh, come on now," said the friend, "Surely you have met at least on girl that you wanted to marry."
"Yes, there was one girl .. once. I guess she was the one perfect girl.
The only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything .. I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me."
"Well, why didn't you marry her," asked the friend.
"She was looking for the perfect man," he said.
A man is flying in a hot air balloon
and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below.
He lowers the balloon further and shouts: "Excuse me, can you help me? I
promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know
where I am."
The man below says: "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude."
"You must be an engineer" says the balloonist.
"I am" replies the man. "How did you know."
"Well" says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of
your information, and the fact is I am still lost."
The man below says "You must be a manager."
"I am" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well", says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."
The man below says: "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude."
"You must be an engineer" says the balloonist.
"I am" replies the man. "How did you know."
"Well" says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of
your information, and the fact is I am still lost."
The man below says "You must be a manager."
"I am" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well", says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."
Two friends, Jenny and Jinny were thinking what to play during the
afternoon. For a long time, they could not decide upon any game.
Suddenly, Jenny had an idea. She turned to Jinny and said excitedly.
"Let's play schools".
"OK!" said Jinny. "But I'm going to be absent."
"OK!" said Jinny. "But I'm going to be absent."
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Since it's Sunday we are going out for breakfast and I've been called from my wife. She's ready to leave so I better to go or they will leave without me.
" SEE YA "
" Cruisin Paul "
Sun burns are not fun! Glad you are feeling better.
ReplyDeleteLove that meme about feeding the cat.
Yes, to much heat can really mess up your day. It did it for me but after drinking a great deal of gatoraide, I'm feeling much better.
DeleteI'm in the secret service. That's my favorite. I linked this post to Silly Sunday.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you feel better. Being out in the sun too long can do some weird things to you. Need a hat and lots of water.
Have a fabulous day, my friend. ☺
I thought you were in the police not the secret sevice. Ha,ha,ha. Thanks sandee, I'm feeling much better.
DeleteGood that you are still back to normal LOL :-)
ReplyDeleteLOL @ the jokes Secret Service and Jimmy going absent LOL
Hope they fed the cat in the end haha!
I am assuming you enjoyed your breakfast have an eggtastic day Pauleo :-)
Thanks again Steveo for thinking about me. Yes my breakfast was great. I had Frenchtoast, bacon & coffee.
ReplyDeleteI do love bacon in a sandwich with brown sauce or as i say braan sauce heheh!
DeleteSuch fun jokes, and i'm glad you are feeling better!
ReplyDeleteThank you Mimi. The sun is dangerous and you have to be careful.
DeleteHubby is an engineer. That is the type of answer I would expect :)
ReplyDeleteFun jokes. I laughed when I saw the giraffes! Glad to hear you are alright now. Do take care. Have a beautiful day!
ReplyDelete