Good morning everyone. We had a very quiet Easter Sunday with just my wife & daughter AmyLynn. I cooked dinner but after we had a serious problem. The sink started to fill up with water, meaning the pipe was filled with whatever. I tried to fix it but this morning we had to call the plumber. Oh well.
Yesterday afternoon I enjoyed a cup of coffee with Gary, a former student of mine. He & I have kept close and try to get together at least once or twice a year. Gary is a detective in the London Police Dept. Many of my former students are in the police dept. and I even have a former student in the RCMP. I'm very proud of all of my former students.
A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball
hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the
enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the
surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were
flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"
"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."
Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew
were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew became
frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red
shirt!". The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, which
the captain put on and lead the crew to battle the pirate boarding
party. Although some casualties occurred among the crew, the pirates
Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels
sending boarding parties. The crew cowered in fear, but the captain calm
as ever bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!". The battle was on, and once
again the Captain and his crew repelled both boarding parties, although
this time more casualties occurred.
Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting
the day's occurrences when an ensign looked to the Captain and asked,
"Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?". The
Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give,
exhorted, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the
wound and thus, you men will continue to fight unafraid". The men sat in
silence marveling at the courage of such a man.
As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were
pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The
men became silent and looked to their Captain for his usual command. The
Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my brown pants!
A cruise ship passes by a remote island, and all the passengers see a
bearded man with an eyepatch running around and waving his arms wildly.
Captain, one passenger asks, who is that man over there?
I have no idea, the captain says, but he goes nuts every year when we pass him.
" SEE YA MY FRIENDS "