Saturday, September 5, 2020

Cool Saturday

Hi there everyone. Well it's now September and the children are going back to school. I'm very worried for my grandchildren, all the children and the teachers. I keep thinking if I was still teaching, what would I do especially with this virus still around. What would you do if you were a teacher? 

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An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her.

She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!"

"You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked. "Why not?"

She replied, "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"

 


 

A kinky passenger grinningly exposed himself to a stewardess as he boarded the plane.

"I'm sorry," said the woman, "but you'll have to show me your ticket, not your stub."

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Stewardess

Yes, Sir?

I want to complain about this airline. Every time I fly, I get the same seat, I can't see the in-flight movie and there are no windows blinds so I can't sleep.

 Captain, shut up and land the plane.

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I was on this plane once...

Captain sets for take off and we are 35000 feet in the air, the captain then sets his mic down but forgets to turn it off.

The captain turns to the co-pilot and says "all I could use right now is a blow job and a cup of coffee".

The stewardess starts running from the back of the plane to tell the captain he still has his mic on.

A guy in the back of the plane screams out "hey hun, don't forget the coffee!".

 

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    I've  never flown anywhere with seats like these. Have you???????



A lawyer boarded an airplane

in Baltimore with a box of frozen soft shell crabs and asked a stewardess to take care of them for him.

She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator..
He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out.

Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.

Shortly before landing in Sarasota Florida, she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the crabs in Baltimore , please raise your hand?"

Not one hand went up .... so she took them home and ate them.

 


 

 


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       " Have a Wonderful Day Friends "

 

 

Cruisin Paul


 



10 comments:

  1. Have a wonderful day, Mr. Cruisin' Paul, thanks for the funnies and i will be praying for Ms. Mary Lou to feel better soon.

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    Replies
    1. Mary Lou was out for the entire day. I was worried but after a good night sleep, she's feels a little bit better. Thank you Mimi.

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  2. LOVE the stewardess pics. Too bad they really don't look like that. Are all your grandkids going back? All mine are doing it on computer. Great setup here. Teacher alone in classroom in front of camera. Going to be a shitshow if kids are around each other.

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    Replies
    1. Well Tim, it seems that my grandchildren are going back to school. I'm not happy with it but the Ontario government is stupid. These kids should stay home and learn without the feat of the virus.

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  3. That's a shame. I thought in Canada you had a choice to do it on computer.My grandkids only had computer learning offered. Hopefully they will stay safe.

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  4. My brother works in a shool he's an IT Technician and he is very worried now the kids are all back.

    I laughed at the funnies shut up and land the plane LOL :-)
    Have a flighttastic safe week Pauleo 😷😷😷

    PS: I added you to my Linky

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  5. I think I'd insist on zoom classes. That may not be to popular with the parents who go to work.

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  6. Hopefully the schools can conduct the classes online. Thank you for the stewardess jokes.

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    Replies
    1. Unfortunately Nancy, I just saw a school bus pass by with children in them. I'm going to pray that these children will be OK.

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Thanks for commenting!