Sunday, April 23, 2023

Oh My God, It's Cold Again

Wow, what a fantastic day it was watching Cole playing hockey. Hello friends. I sat there so amazed at Cole with his hockey abilities. His team won 12 to 5 and Cole himself scored 4 goals and assisted 3 of goals. He could have scored more goal. He hit the goal post twice . What a great day.

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Yesterday was Earth Day. We as people had better start doing better about our earth or it will gone.

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If you don't know what to talk abouton a first date try mentioning Global Warming.

It's a huge icebreaker. 

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What do you call a house warming party for an Inuit?

Eviction. 

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An Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day, when the daughter said, "My hands are freezing cold!" The mother replied, "Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up."

The daughter did and her hands warmed up.

The next day, the daughter was riding with her boy friend who said, "My hands are freezing cold!"

The girl replied, "Put them between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm them up."

He did and warmed his hands.

The following day, the boyfriend was again in the buggy with the daughter.

He said, "My nose is cold."

The girl replied, "Put it between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm it up."

He did and warmed his nose.

The next day, the boyfriend was again driving with the daughter and he said, "My penis is frozen solid."

The following day, the daughter was driving in the buggy with her mother again and she says to her mother, "Have you ever heard of a penis?"

Slightly concerned the mother said, "Why, yes. Why do you ask?"

The daughter replies, "They make one heck of a mess when they defrost, don't they?!"

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Cruisin Paul

 


  

Thursday, April 13, 2023

It's So Hot Outside.

Good morning my friends. It's been awhile but I'm back. I just came back from Sarnia seeing a specialist for my eyes.I have glaucoma and I have to come back in June to have laser on both of my eyes. I guess the eyes should drain a liquid and my left eye is is blocked as he told me. What ever that is. A problem I had staying in the Comfort Inn. I informed them when I called for a reservation I informed them that I needed a special room that has for a wheelchair problems. I was told no problem sir. We get there the first room had a tub. The second room the bathroom was so small you'd have to climb over the toilet to go to the shower and the third one the shower had NO bars. Even my wife had a problem taking a shower without a problem falling. Basically there were no rooms for people who have person  problems. I thought today Inns had rooms for us people.There were so many problems these rooms had you'd have to ask to built these rooms. Frustrations.

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The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?” “Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”

 

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The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession. "Of course, my son," said the priest. "Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her." "That's a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess," said the priest. "It's worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her sexual favors," continued the old man. "Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk -you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest. "Thanks, Father," said the old man. "That's a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?" "Of course, my son," said the priest. The old man asked, "Do I need to tell her that the war is over?".

 

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 Every Man needs a Beautiful wife, a caring wife, a loving wife, a sexy wife, and an adjusting & cooperative wife. Unfortunately, the law only allows a man ONE wife.

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Cruisin Paul



                            

 

Saturday, April 1, 2023

Good morning everyone. It's been awhile but I'm here now. We are leaving later to watch Cole play hockey. It's a different type of game where the players play instead of 5 players, you play 3 against 3 players along goalies. I've never seen it before but I'll see it later. Alex & Cole were called up together to receive the MVP of the team award ( Alex ) and the Most Sportmanship Award ( Cole ), Cole ( on the right ) is my grandson. These two exciting hockey would fly down the ice and score so many goals. They are very close friends. Everyone was so proud of what the entire team did this year. .Here is a photo of the with their coach.

I took my Camero in to Thrasher's to have an oil change and the tires. I'm ready to go.

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Cruisin Paul