Monday, August 28, 2023

Good morning everyone. It's been awhile but I'm back. We've had a couple bad nights for storms around here. We had  storms with heavy rains, loud thunder and vicious lightning. 

Well it's only one week left for school. It's been 19 years since I retired for teaching. Wow.I can't believe it. 

Next week I have to go to have my right eye done with the cataract operation. 

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  September is Alzheimer's Awareness Month

                   ........ Never forget. 

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 I called the library and asked if they could tell me when the Mesozoic Era started.

 
She said, " About 250 million years ago."

I said, "Could you be more specific? It's for homework."

She said, "Hang on a minute."

She came back and said, "It started September 17, two - hundred & fifty -one million years BC."

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Did anyone else know September is deaf awarness month?

............ I'd never heard of it. 

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 What do you call carving a pumpkin in September?

......... Premature ejackolatern.

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Cruisin Paul




 


Sunday, August 13, 2023

Good Sunday morning friends. August is morning along. We've having many storms and my lawn i looking great expect the boulevard and that's because the town sprayed something on it and it's messed it up, stupid town.

Next week I go to see Dr. Dean for my eyes again. My daughter AmyLynn enjoyed her time at the cottage. Now she said that she would like to go back next year. 

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On a hot summer day there were two boys playing by a stream.

One boy went over to the bush to check out some noises.

He pointed out a woman bathing naked in the steam.

So, both boys decided to stay and watch her.

All of a sudden the second boy took off running.

The first boy couldn’t understand why he ran away, so he took off after his friend.

Finally, he caught up to him and asked his friend why he had run away.

The second boy said to his friend, “My mom told me that if I ever saw a naked lady, I’d turn to stone.”
 
 " I felt something getting hard , so I ran. "
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Three Southern Belles are sipping a lemonade on the porch swing one hot summer day.

The first one says "Ah heard tell of a boah kissin' anothuh boah. They call them 'ho-mo-seck-shules'."

They all giggle and fan themselves.

The second one says "Wail, AH heard of a gurl kissin' anothuh gurl. They call them 'lez-bee-ans'."

They all turn slightly red and sip their lemonade.

The third one says "Wail, AH know a boah who kisses a gurl on her prahhh-vit pahts between huhr laigs."

"Oh mah," the first one says. "What do they cawl him?"
 " Wail, AH call him ' precious ' " she smiles.
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A rabbi and a priest are out for a walk through the park.

It's a hot summer day and as they pass by a pond, the rabbi suggest taking a bath to cool down a little.
The priest is hesitant at first, but since they're at a remote spot with noone around, he agrees.

Just as they have finished taking off their robes a group of ladies is jogging by. The priest hastily covers his crotch, while the rabbi hides his face behind his hands.

When the ladies have passed, the priest asks:
"Why didn't you cover your private parts?"

To which the rabbi replies: 
     
   " Well, My congregation recognize me by my Face." 
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Hygienic!

Two girls were walking down the sidewalk on a hot summer day. They come upon this old lady sitting on steps in front of her house eating watermelon. They notice that she wasn`t wearing any panties. So they ask her if its cooler without wearing any panties. 
 She said " I don't know if it's cooler but sure 
keeps the flies off the watermelon. "
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Cruisin Paul