March 30th, Ice, Cold, Rain and At the End, 60 degrees.

Good morning, finally I'm ready for my blog. It's Spring time and March is almost finished. My wife's birthday is March 31st. She completes the month. My daughter made her mother's birthday cake and we're  ready for her mother's birthday for tomorrow. Today we're going  for lunch at Riccardo's Italian dinner eatery. I love the food at Riccardo's.

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I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer.

Plus it's fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.  

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The cost of forgetting fresh, hot tea.........

..........is steep. 

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Cruisin Paul

 

 

 

It's Spring.....Cold & Wet

Good Thursday morning everyone or whomever is checking on my blog. Well Ron & I have finished his gazebo and it looks great. Now we have to get mine done but the weather isn't helping us. All I'm getting now is rain. 

I bought a hoodie outfit with the comment on the front " Amherst Alumni " and on the back it says 

" Once a Bulldog...... Always a Bulldog " with a Bulldog on the back. Now you are asking, whats that?  I graduated in 1970 from General Amherst High School. I played football for 3 years and I was totally involved with the school. Now, they built a brand new school with a brand name and no more Bulldog. It will now be a wolf. You know, they teach history and this guy called General Amherst did some bad things 300 years so now silly people wanted to get rid of anything dealing with Amherst even the name of my town, Amherstburg. I taught history for over 30 years and my goodness, if I was to change everything in history what would we have? I'm so upset with these stupid people but I guess I have to control.That's life.

 

 

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                      Spring Break in Arizona.

Two blonde are driving to Miami for Spring Beak.

On a long boring stretch of highway, they start complaining about how long it's taking to get there and the driver asks " What do you think is further away, Florida or the moon? " The passenger replies " Oh my God, you give blondes a bad name. I can't believe how stupid you are, you can't even see Florida from here." 

 What says the nymphomaniac's right leg to her left leg, at the end of Spring Break?

" Long time no see! "

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Two drunk students meet in a bar on Spring Break, and decide to screw on the beach

Guy can't find his condom, but decides to screw her anyways. When they finish, the girl says, "I should have asked before, but do you have herpes?"

Guy says, "No, I'm clean"

Girl responds, "Good - I don't want to get that shit again"

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Cruisin Paul

                              Curacao
                                                                                                  
                    

 

It Rained Last Night And Will Rain Today, Wet, Wet, Wet.

Good morning my friends. I'd like to start today about my dad. Yesterday was March 18th, the day he died, 22 years ago. I can't really believe it. I plan on writing a good blog about him but for now I just want to say I really miss him. He was a very strong man but very loving. He always worked hard throughout his life. What made him the best was his smile. As I said, I will eventually write a larger blog about him.

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3 senior citizens are having a conversation in the waiting room of their doctor

They are all pretty old, 80+ years, and they all shaking, they have tremors.

One says to the others "It's true that when you get old your body isn't worth much more, it's useless!"

The other says "You are right, look at me how much I shake!"

They all agree and say they also shake so much, they all have uncontrollable tremors

one of the old man says "Today I went to shave, and I cut all my face up!"

the second old man says "Today I went to have some coffee and I poured it all on myself!"

The third old man says "Today I went to take a piss and I came 3 times!"

 

 

 

A senior citizen drove his brand new Mercedes to 100 mph, looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a police car behind him

He floored it to 140, then 150, ... then 170, ...

Suddenly he thought, "I'm too old for this nonsense !"
So he pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the police car to catch up with him .

The officer walked up to him, looked at his watch and said,
"Sir, my shift ends in ten minutes.
Today is Friday and I'm taking off for the weekend.
If you can give me a good reason that I've never heard before for why you were speeding.
I'll let you go."

The Man looked very seriously at the police man, and replied :-

"Years ago, my wife ran off with a policeman, I thought you were bringing her back." !!!

The Cop left saying,
" Have a good day, Sir"

 

 

  Carnival is offering a new voyage where you set sail and leave a bunch of senior citizens behind in the snow.

" It's called a Ted Cruise. "

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Cruisin Paul

                             Grand Turk

             

Happy St. Patrick Day, Go Green

Happy St. Patrick Day my friends. I'm wearing a sport shirt & shorts today because it's going to in the 70's. Amazing! The last two days I've been helping my friend Ron putting up his new gazebo and he's told me that when the time comes, he'll help me. It's good having friends.

         

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Cruisin Paul

 

Wow! Good evening everyone. It was so crazy today. When I walked out of my bedroom and opened my windows ( 9:00 am ) it was a little blizzard. Yes, it was snowing heavily.  Now  at 6:20 pm all the snow is gone and the temperature is around 45 degrees. Crazy, crazy, crazy. Today Mary Lou & I put up 9 - 10 inch art pieces  that  she did. By the time we put them together on the wall, It was beautiful.

 Later during the day she made 2 loaves of homemade bread. She quite a woman.

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 A few days ago I was tooling along through the neighborhood on my my wheelchair when I noticed a young boy sitting on the retaining wall in front of his house crying as if his heart was breaking.

I pulled alongside the youngster and asked, " Son, what's the matter? Why are you crying?

" I'm crying cause I can't do what my 20 year old brother does," he said.

Oh my God, I sat there and cried with him.

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A grandma & grandpa are going out for their daily health walk and grandma can't decide. " I don't know, Joe, should I wear my bra do you think?"

" Yeah, Rosie, you better, it's quite muddy out side." 

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Ah, the modern days. I just saw a grandpa help a youngster who was staring into his phone to cross the street.  

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I was begging God to give me a hot body.

Great. Now I’m enjoying the hot flashes of menopause.

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Cruisin Paul

 

 

       
 

They Say It's Lovely Getting Old. Who Said That?

Well, well, well. Here we are again my friends. The ice and snow are gone for now. I'm suppose to get some snow on Friday. Lucky me! Tomorrow night my neighbors, Ron & Judy are coming over to spend some time playing cards and then having coffee. I decided to make a cake to enjoy with our coffee. 

My friend John sent me a photo of himself sitting in a chair in Punta Cana. I think he's in the Dominican Republic . Lucky him, sunshine and warm weather.

                                 Lucky John!

Bob, age 92, and Mary, age 89, are all excited about their decision to get married. While out for a stroll to discuss the wedding they pass a drugstore. Bob suggests they go in.

Bob asks to speak to the pharmacist. He explains they're about to get married, and asks,

"Do you sell heart medication?"

"Of course we do," the pharmacist replies.

"Medicine for rheumatism?"

"Definitely," he says.

"How about Viagra?"

"Of course."

"Medicine for memory problems, arthritis, jaundice?"

"Yes, the works."

"What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antacids?"

"Absolutely."

"Do you sell wheelchairs and walkers?"

"All speeds and sizes."

"Good," Bob says to the pharmacist. "We'd like to register for our wedding gifts here, please." 

 

 

"To my friend's astonishment, a police car pulled up to her house and her elderly grand-father got out. The patrolman explained that the old gentleman had been lost in the city park and had asked for help.

"Why, Grandfather," my friend said, "you've been going there for 40 years. How could you get lost?"

The old man smiled slyly. "Wasn't exactly lost," he admitted. "I just got tired of walking."

 

 "Because they had no reservations at a busy restaurant, my elderly neighbor and his wife were told there would be a 45-minute wait for a table.

"Young man, we're both 90 years old," he told the maitre d'. "We may not have 45 minutes."

They were seated immediately."

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Cruisin Paul