Saturday, December 15, 2018

A Very, Dull, Saturday

Good afternoon everyone. I'm so very happy, more than that I'm excited after spending some time with my travel agent and good friend Nancy and her husband Edgar at Tim Horton's. Nancy was there to give me the necessary papers I needed for my cruise, 10 night Ultimate Caribbean Cruise. I also needed the papers for my night before at the FairField Inn in Michigan near the airport. We are flying out of Metro Airport at 07:10 am in the morning and arrive at Ft. Lauderdale Hollywood Intl. in Florida. 
After that Nancy also informed with a cruise that she planning in 2020 and wanted to know if I would like be included. She said it's a 11 Night Ultimate Caribbean Cruise. I looked at my wife and she said to me, " Paul, it's up to you." and of course she knew that would say YES! So we set for 2020. Unbelievable! The cruises are on the same ship the Celebrity Refection. After 2020 that would be three times on the same ship. WOW! I'm a very lucky guy.


Entering  Heaven
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes  Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's glasses.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "They're Carol's."

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A Sign of the Times

As a little girl climbed onto Santa's lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?"
The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: "Didn't you get my E-mail?"

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Santa Stats

There are currently 78 people named S. Claus
living in the U.S. -- and one Kriss Kringle.
(You gotta wonder about that one kid's parents)

December is the most popular month for nose jobs.

Weight of Santa's sleigh loaded with one Beanie Baby
for every kid on earth: 333,333 tons.

Number of reindeer required to pull a 333,333-ton s
sleigh: 214,206 -- plus Rudolph.

Average wage of a mall Santa: $11 an hour.
With real beard: $20.

To deliver his gifts in one night, Santa would have to
make 822.6 visits per second, sleighing at 3,000 times
the speed of sound.

At that speed, Santa and his reindeer would burst into flame

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Christmas Fireman

In a small Southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed   great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature  bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen's helmets.  Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left.

At a "Quick Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You damn Yankees never do read the Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face she said

"See, it says right here,  'The three wise man came from afar.'"



                                  " SEE YA "



  1. Heeheehee! We all need a laugh to keep us going through the season.

    It sounds like you are all set for cruising, i am so very happy for you!

    1. Christmss time is meant to be a joyous time, a happy time and a laughing time and it seems that you my friend is a joyous,happy and a person who likes to laugh. That's you Mimi.

  2. Afar. Bwahahahahahahaha. Bless their hearts.

    Good for you to have all your cruise paperwork done for this year and you're locked in for 2020 too. Way to go.

    Have a fabulous weekend, my friend. 🎄🎄🎄

    1. I really got a kick out of " afar ". Yes, Sandee, I'm excited for both of the cruises. You to my friend.

  3. Good to see you have got everything with your up and coming cruise sorted and also even further ahead even I'm excited and I ain't even going anywhere heheh!

    LOL @ Santa's crack, I wonder if the other guy visiting Santa did get to poop LOL

    Thanks for the laughs Pauleo :-)

    Have a cruisetastic day :-)

    1. You know my friend, you could join us on the 2020 cruise on the Celebrity Reflection. Now that would be an interesting way for you & I to meet for the first time.

  4. who is carol?...wife, daughter or a grandma?
    thank you for funny memes.
    have a great day

    1. His wife and daughter and grandmother all together. Now that would be very interesting Tanza. See ya.

  5. Indeed, you are one lucky guy! Already booking a cruise for 2020 when you just about to go for the 2019 cruise. Happy cruising and happy holiday!

    1. Yes Nancy, I am a very lucky man. I really enjoy what I've enjoyed, cruising. God has given me the opportunity to do something that I love.Merry Christmas my friend.

  6. Well you lucky man, where ever do you find these funny cartoons? Hope your week is marvelous.

    1. Yes Peg, I am a very lucky man thank God. The cartoon that I like the most is the one that the grandmother wanted a grandfather clock and of course what did she get? You know, LOL.

  7. Cruising in the tropics during your winter is a good plan. I hope Santa doesn't fry delivering all those Beanie Babies.

    1. You know Rhonda I've been asked why I don't take a cruise to Alaska? I might do that but for now I want to be around sun & heat since in January around my pace is cold and snow.


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