Tuesday, December 18, 2018

A Warm Tuesday Evening

Good evening friends. I've been so busy these last few days between getting gifts, wrapping them, baking a Christmas Tree cake, making meatballs and making dinner everyday. I was planning to look for a final Christmas gift for my wife but when she noticed that there were five gifts already under the Christmas tree and asked whose gifts they were, I said they for her. She informed me that was fantastic but don't buy anything more. I said OK but sometimes I lie. LOL.





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An Axe to Grind

A boy begs his father to get him a Christmas tree this year.
Each year, the boy asks and the father tells him, "I don't
want to pay for it."

But the son kept begging. Unable to bear his son's whining,
he picks up his axe one day and heads out of the house.
Thirty minutes later he returns with a great big Christmas tree. "How did you cut it down so fast?" his son asks.

"I didn't cut it down," the father replies.
"I got it at a tree lot."

"Then why did you bring an axe?"

"Because I didn't want to pay."


  


Christmas shopping

A judge asks the culprit:
- Please explain me, what are you being prosecuted for?
- I was doing my Christmas shopping too early, - replied the defendant
- But that’s not a crime, - says the judge quite surprised.  – How early were you doing your Christmas shopping?
- Before the store opened…




A mother thinks there’s something strange going on and eventually decides to take a DNA test.

She finds out that their child is actually not related to her or her husband at all.

Wife: "Darling, there’s something really important that we need to talk about. I did a DNA test and Roger isn't our biological child."

Husband: "Of course he isn’t, don’t you remember? We were just leaving the hospital and the baby pooped hugely so you told me, ‘Go and change the baby, I’ll wait here.’”
 
 
 
 



What A Girl Wants For Christmas

The Santa Claus at the shopping mall was very surprised when a Emily, young lady aged about 20 years old walked up and sat on his lap.  Now, we all know that Santa doesn't usually take requests from adults, but she smiled very nicely at him, so he asked her, 'What do you want for Christmas?' 'Something for my mother, please,' replied Emily sweetly. 'Something for your mother? Well, that's very loving and thoughtful of you,' smiled Santa. 'What do would you like me to bring her?' Without turning a hair Emily answered quickly, 'A son-in-law.'








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                     " SEE YA MY FRIENDS "

Cruisin Paul

 



14 comments:

  1. Go change the baby. Good grief. Fun Christmas funnies.

    Looks like you're very busy getting food ready for Christmas.

    Have a fabulous day and week, Paul. 🎄🎄🎄

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Sandee, I'm trying to get things ready for the big day and it's not going on my cruise.LOL

      Delete
  2. Heeheehee! Change the baby indeed. And a son-in-law, that sounds out of Santa's league.

    Enjoy your Christmas preparations!

    ReplyDelete
  3. we need to "lie" sometimes...hehehe...lol
    have a great day

    ReplyDelete
  4. Clever! I enjoyed your blog. From Straight up- No Chaser blog. I'll be back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for dropping by. Glad that you enjoyed it. See ya.

      Cruisin Paul

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. Thank you for spending some of your time to read my blog. Have a very Merry Christmas & a Happy New Year.

      Delete
  6. Hi Paul, that was a quick answer you gave your wife. To all expecting mothers out there, safer not to ask your husband to change your baby! Heheheee...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You know Nancy, when we had our babies, I had no problem changing them and they were our own kids. LOL

      Delete
  7. You been very busy Pauleo I wished I had the enthusiasm ffor cooking that you do LOL

    I loved the jokes I hope you don't drop your balls when your playing golf that could hinder your game you know :-)

    Time seems to go so quick don't it Pauleo it was only a year ago since the last Christmas ;-)

    Have a tinseltastic Sunday and stop lying LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Time seems to go so quick don't it Pauleo it was only a year ago since the last Christmas ;- Guess what my friend? Christmas will be there next year also. WOW! LOL Have a great day my friend.

      Delete

Thanks for commenting!