Saturday, August 3, 2019

August Saturday

The sun's out, a nice little breeze going through the trees and I sitting in my soft chair and writing my post. I should be watching golf at the moment but just for my good friend I will do my post. I haven't seen my grandchildren at all this week. It's so quiet.

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A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?" The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old." "Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?" She said, "Your name never came up in the conversation." 


A husband exclaims to his wife one day, "Your butt is getting really big. It's bigger than the BBQ grill!" Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"  

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A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of just her husband's two. She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. He says, "Hi darling, your parents have come to visit us, so I let them stay in our bedroom. Did you say hello?" 


A guy and his wife are sitting and watching a boxing match on television. The husband sighs and complains, “This is disappointing. It only lasted for 30 seconds!” “Good,” replied his wife. “Now you know how I always feel.”  

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Teacher: "Answer this math problem: if your father earns $500 a week and gives half to your mother. What will he have?"
Student: "A heart attack." 






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                        " See Ya By Wonderful Friends "


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Cruisin Paul
 

9 comments:

  1. love the jokes this morning. Enjoy the quiet. Are all 5 grandkids on vacation or just enjoying the warm weather outside instead?

    Enjoy watching your golf....bet you'd rather be out swinging.
    Have a good one.

    TrippinTim

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    1. Yes Tim, I wish I could get out on the course but my balance is not yet right. It's quiet here also.

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  2. Heeheehee! Fun marriage jokes, those can be the best.

    Hope you have a fun and quiet Saturday!

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    1. Mimi, it's been quiet around here but I want some excitment in my life. Not really.

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  3. LOL loved these and I can assure you Pauleo I never blame my farts on someone else...ever.....I just lied ;-)

    It's sunny and breezy here too but the breeze is cool so quite nice

    Have a funnytastic day and remember Pauleo always own up to your own bum burps ;-)

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    Replies
    1. I always own up to my farts and to everythings Steveo. I'm a true person. LOL

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Thanks for commenting!