Wednesday, November 13, 2019

Snowy Wednesday

Good morning everyone. Well it's still Autumn but surprise, we had 6 - 8 inches of the white stuff but others in Michigan received 14 inches. The leaves are still coming off the trees. So, I decided to begin preparing for Christmas. I finished with my Christmas tree and decorated my fireplace mantle. I think it's still to early to keep my Camero in the garage but my baby has never touched snow. November is to early to take the car off the road. The sun is out today. maybe it will help me and get rid of this junk.

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A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist. "I do" replies the man. "How did you know?" "Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone." The man below replies, "You must work in management." "I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?" "Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."




Through the pitch-black night, the captain sees a light dead ahead on a collision course with his ship. He sends a signal: "Change your course ten degrees east." The light signals back: "Change yours, ten degres west." Angry, the captain sends: "I'm a Navy captain! Change your course, sir!" "I'm a seaman, second class," comes the reply. "Change your course, sir." Now the captain is furious. "I'm a battleship! I'm not changing course!" There's one last reply. "I'm a lighthouse. Your call."




All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge. "I should be in charge," said the brain, "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen." "I should be in charge," said the blood, "Because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd waste away." "I should be in charge," said the stomach," Because I process food and give all of you energy." "I should be in charge," said the legs, " ;because I carry the body wherever it needs to go." "I should be in charge," said the eyes, "Because I allow the body to see where it goes." "I should be in charge," said the rectum, "Because Im responsible for waste removal." All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight. Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery, and the blood Was toxic. They all decided that the rectum should be the boss. The Moral of the story? Even though the others do all the work... The ass hole is usually in charge.

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     " Well that's it for today. See ya. "


Cruisin Paul
 

6 comments:

  1. Many are taking about all the snow. I hope it goes away and soon.

    Love all the funnies and especially the email one. Good grief.

    Have a fabulous day, Paul. 😎

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Sandee. Happy that you enjoyed the jokes.

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  2. My hope is that the snow melts and doesn't come back until it is supposed to, say in January.

    Thanks for the jokes!

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  3. Thanks for reminding me that Christmas is fast approaching. Thanks for the jokes. Enjoy your Christmas preparation.

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Thanks for commenting!