My friend Carol had this on her blog and I just loved it. Thank you Carol. I love this and I do believe this what being a blogger is all about.
It's Wednesday, Hump day. Guess what? This area got something new. Coco Paving came and did our roads yesterday. Brand new asphalt and this morning some ass in his dump truck drove on it and left pieces of mud. Well it fit perfectly like my lawn ( mud ).
Little Karl was with his grandma in a supermarket
Grandma replied: We are in a public place, don't say you need to pee, say something nice, say you need to sing.
Later, when grandma was sleeping, Little Karl went to grandmas room and woke her: Granny, I need to sing!
Grandma: It's midnight, you can't sing now.
Little Karl: But I need to sing really bad!
Grandma: Well ok then. Sing quietly to grannys ear.
My grandma had cataract surgery on both eyes
Gpa: She’s recovering really well, she can see much clearer. She’s pretty happy with the results.
Me: That’s good, no side effects?
Gpa: There is one troubling side effect
Me: What? Is she okay?
Gpa: Yah, she’s fine, but she can actually see me now.
A girl was a prostitute, but she did not want her grandma to know
Suddenly the girl's grandma came by and saw her. "Why are you standing in line, dear?" she asked. Not willing to let her grandma know the truth, the girl told her that the policemen were passing out free oranges. "Why, that is awfully nice of them! I think I'll get some for myself," said the grandma.
A policeman went down the line, asking for information from all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, he exclaimed, "Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it?"
Grandma replied, "Oh, it's easy, dear. I just take out my dentures and suck them dry!"