Friday, March 18, 2016
Brilliant Sunny Friday
Yes, it's Friday. What are you doing today? Me, I'm not doing much.
Q: What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
A: "We better get some support before someone thinks we're nuts!"
Question: Why are hurricanes sometimes named after women? Answer: When they come they’re wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.
A man in his mid forties bought a new BMW and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to see what the engine had. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him. “There’s no way they can catch a BMW,” he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, then 100, and finally reality hit him and he knew he shouldn’t run from the police, so he slowed down and pulled over. The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. “It’s been a long day, this is the end of my shift and it’s Friday the 13th. I don’t feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before, you can go.” The guy thinks for a second and says, “Last week my wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back.” “Have a nice weekend,” said the officer and he walked away.
A crowded city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman wearing a tight leather skirt was waiting for a bus. As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. She tried to again take the step, only to discover that she couldn’t. So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step. Once again, much to her embarrassment she could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more and again was unable to take the step. About this time, a large guy who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus. The went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and screeched, "How dare you touch my body! I don’t even know who you are!" The guy smiled and drawled, "Well, ma’am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kind’a figured we were friends."
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That's it for today. Have a wonderful Friday my friends.
" SEE YA "
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I love that picture of the girl in the white dress with all the thoughts of people she passed by only there was one that was left out. I'll let you use your imagination to figure out which one I mean.
ReplyDeleteMy friends and I had breakfast together and we later visited a friend who is recuperating at home after a minor operation. Had a quiet afternoon at home and had dinner with another friend this evening. That was my Friday. Have a beautiful day, Paul!
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a fabulous day and weekend my friend.
ReplyDeleteLoved all the jokes. ☺
Laughter between jobs keeps me going! Thank you, and i hope you have a blessed and beautiful Friday.
ReplyDeleteI'n not doing much either LOL
ReplyDeleteThe It Is Friday poster is so cute heheh!
Loved the funnies thanks for the laughs and saggy boobs LOL
Enjoy the rest of today Paul :-)
Great post, Paul! Thank you so much for the smiles.
ReplyDeleteDick has been painting the patio and I have been the go-fer. Whew! And it is hawt.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs, honey...