Sunday, July 10, 2016

Warm Sunday Morning


Good morning friends. Well the weather has been pretty good lately but as we enter this week they say it will be in the 90's and humid. I guess, you can never get the proper weather. Our daughter tells us that she wishes that it was winter because it's to hot in the summer and in the winter she says to us it's to cold she wishes it was summer. She can never satisfied. I guess that is what is wrong with humans, they can never be satisfied. As far as I'm concerned, I take whatever the day gives to me and deal with it to the best of my ability. What do you think?

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A young couple was out cruising one evening. While driving down the highway the guy says to the girl, "If I go 100 miles an hour, will you take off all of your clothes?" She agrees and he begins to speed up.
When the speedometer hits 100 she starts to strip. When she gets all her clothes off, he is so busy staring at her that he drives off the road and flips the car over.
The girl is thrown clear without a scratch but her clothes and her boyfriend are trapped in the car. "Go get help.", he pleads. She replies, "I can't, I'm naked."
He points to his shoe that was thrown clear and says "Cover your crotch with that and go get help from the gas station down the road."
She takes the shoe, covers herself between the legs, and runs to the gas station down the road. When she arrives she is frantic and yells to the attendant, "HELP! HELP! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The attendant looks down at the shoe covering her crotch and replies with some astonishment, "I think he's too far in!"




Little Johnny's "Bookish" Father


Little Johnny was in class and the teacher announced that they were going to try something different to help everyone get to know each other a little better, and to help with their spelling.
She explained, "I want you to stand up and give us the occupation of your father, spell it, and say one thing he would give us all if he was here today."
The first student raised her hand to volunteer.
"Marcy," the teacher said. "You may go first."
Marcy replied, "My father is a banker. B-A-N-K-E-R and if he was here today, he would give us all a shiny new penny."
The teacher said, "Very nice, Marcy, who wants to go next?"
Kevin stood up and announced, "My father is a baker. B-A-K-E-R and if he was here today, he would give us all a freshly-baked cookie."
"Very good," the teacher told Kevin.
Jeff was next, and he said, "My father is an accountant. A-K, no wait, A-C-K, no..."
Before he could attempt to spell it once more, the teacher cut him off and told him to sit back down and to think about it for a while. When he thought he knew how to spell it, he could stand back up and try again.
Little Johnny raised his hand in excitement hoping to be acknowledged by the teacher. The teacher called on little Johnny to go next.
Johnny said, "My father is a bookie. B-O-O-K-I-E and if he was here today, he would give us all 20:1 odds Jeff will never be able to spell "accountant."






Girlfriend - Boyfriend 



The sweet, caring, loyal, loving boyfriend -
never fights,
never argues,
never takes advantage,
never leaves,
never slaps,
never makes you cry,
never hurts,
.
.
.
and doesn’t exist!


girl,sexy
Dianne goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor, I've got a bit of a problem. I'll have to take my clothes off to show you."

The doctor tells her to go behind the screen and disrobe. She does so, and the doctor goes round to see her when she is ready.

"Well, what is it?" he asks.

"It's a bit embarrassing," she replies. "These two green circles have appeared on the inside of my thighs."

The doctor examines her and finally admits he has no idea what the cause is. Then he suddenly asks, "Is your boyfriend a Harley rider?"

The woman blushes and says, "Well, actually he is."

"That's the problem," the doctor says. "Tell him his earrings aren't real gold."
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That's about it for now my friends. Have an enjoyable, warm but breezy Sunday.
 
                                                                       " SEE YA "





3 comments:

  1. I will take whatever weather there is and deal with it too. I enjoy all the seasons, but spring is my favorite.

    I linked you to Silly Sunday for all the fun jokes.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

    ReplyDelete
  2. I take the weather as it is too I am so used to rain LMAO my favourite season is Autumn always loved it.

    I'm laughing at the jokes that poor man tasered LOL now that is a snore stopper.

    Have a warmtastic day Pauleo :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Death and destruction are never full, and the eyes of man are never satisfied." Proverbs 27:20

    It's human nature to want what we don't have, i think. Curly haired people spend a ton on keratin treatments to straighten their hair, while people with straight as a stick hair pay for permanents.

    Anyway, funny jokes as usual, and i hope you have a blessed and beautiful Sunday!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting!