Good evening my friends, especially those who are able to get my blog. With this Google+ being taken away, some of my good friends have been unable to get back into my blog. As I get older everyday, I been thinking about this blog writing. Some day I will being say " adios " but not today.
------------------------------------------------
At St. Peter's Catholic Church in Toronto , they have weekly husband's
marriage seminars.
At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was
approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and
share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same
woman all these years.
Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, "Wella, I'va tried to treat
her nicea, spenda da money on her, but besta of all is, I tooka her to
Italy for the 25th anniversary!"
The priest responded, "Giuseppe, you are an amazing inspiration to all
the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife
for your 50th anniversary?"
Giuseppe proudly replied, " I gonna go pick her up."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray,
"Take only one. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
One child whispered to another, "Take all you want.
God is watching the apples."
A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet.
One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well.
Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
"Yes it is," the man replies.
"You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks.
"No thanks," the man replies.
"I think you do want to buy a baseball," the little extortionist continues.
"OK. How much?" the man replies after considering the position he is in.
"Twenty-five dollars," the little boy replies. "TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!"
the man repeats incredulously, but complies to protect his hidden
position.
The following week, the lover is visiting the woman
again when she hears a car in the driveway and, again, places her lover
in the closet with her little boy.
"It's dark in here, isn't it?" the boy starts off.
"Yes it is," replies the man.
"Wanna buy a baseball glove?" the little boy asks.
"OK. How much?" the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his disadvantage.
"Fifty dollars," the boy replies and the transaction is completed.
The next weekend, the little boy's father says "Hey, son. Go get your ball and glove and we'll play some catch."
"I can't. I sold them," replies the little boy.
"How much did you get for them?" asks the father, expecting to hear the profit in terms of lizards and candy.
"Seventy-five dollars," the little boy says.
"SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?! That's thievery! I'm taking you to the church
right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness", the
father explains as he hauls the child away.
At the church, the little boy goes into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
"Don't you start that shit in here," the priest says.
------------------------------------------
One morning a man comes into the church on crutches. He stops in front
of the holy water and splashes some of it on both of his legs, then
throws away his crutches.
An altar boy witnessed the scene and runs into the rectory to tell the priest what he'd just seen.
Without batting an eye, the priest says, "Son, you've just witnessed a miracle. Tell me, where is this man?"
"Flat on his ass, Father, over by the holy water."
--------------------------------
" See Ya My Friends "
Cruisin Paul
Oh, you were full of frivolity and fun this evening. Hope you are having a great week so far!
ReplyDeleteBeing a Catholic, I jut wanted some fun last night.
DeleteLove reading the funnies.
ReplyDeleteThank you Gene for keeping up with my blog. Others that use to come into my blog are having problems.
Deleteas always good ones Paul.
ReplyDeleteThanks Peg for taking all effort to come back into my blog. I tried the forum and they didn't help me.If more of my friends are having problems getting into my blog, I might as well close it up. We'll see.
DeleteLove all the funnies. That little boy in the closet is quite the deal maker.
ReplyDeleteHave a fabulous day and week, Paul. 😎
Thanks Sandee for taking your time checking my blog. It means a great deal to me,
DeleteI think we have the same problem. When people visit our blog, they don't automatically see our new post. Maybe you should inform your friend to scroll down to the end of the page, and click on "Home" to get the new post or click on "Posts Achive" for the latest post.
ReplyDeleteThey try it but still can't find it. I don't know what the problem is.
DeleteGood ones today. Sorry that Google+ is making things difficult.
ReplyDeleteIt makes me angry because some friends are unable to go into my blog. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
DeleteMaybe they should set your blog as a bookmark?
Delete