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Grandma and grandpa lived in a one room house with their kids so had little "private time".
Grandma said if you wake up in the
middle of the night and you want to make love squeeze my breast once. If
you don't want to make love squeeze it twice. Grandpa said OK if you
wake up in the middle of the night and you want to make love squeeze my
privates once.
If you don't want to make love, SQUEEZE it 20 times.
Grandma and Grandpa were staying over at their kids house.
When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills.
The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad, they're very strong and very expensive."
"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$10.00 a pill," answered the son.
"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow. "
Later the next morning, the son found $110 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10, not $110.
"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma!"
The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad, they're very strong and very expensive."
"How much?" asked Grandpa.
"$10.00 a pill," answered the son.
"I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow. "
Later the next morning, the son found $110 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10, not $110.
"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma!"
" I know, " said Grandpa. " The hundred is from Grandma!"
Grandpa and Grandma are sitting on a bench in the park
they hear the jingle of the icecream salesman.
Grandma says : "I'd like some vanilla icecream."
Grandpa says: "Good idea, I'd also like some chocolate icecream".
Grandma stands up and says: "I'll go get some."
"You should write it, Grandma, you know your memory is not what it was... you'll forget !"
"Don't worry Grandpa, I won't, it's easy : vanilla, chocolate. Vanilla, Chocolate..."
And thus Grandma leaves Grandpa while singsonging " Vanilla, Chocolate,Vanilla , Chocolate...."
A while later, Grandma comes back with a couple of hotdogs in her hands.
"Grandma ! what did you take ??? "
"Look Grandpa, I took two ketchup hot-dogs !"
"Grandma... I told you to write it down ! I knew you'd forget the mustard !"
Grandma says : "I'd like some vanilla icecream."
Grandpa says: "Good idea, I'd also like some chocolate icecream".
Grandma stands up and says: "I'll go get some."
"You should write it, Grandma, you know your memory is not what it was... you'll forget !"
"Don't worry Grandpa, I won't, it's easy : vanilla, chocolate. Vanilla, Chocolate..."
And thus Grandma leaves Grandpa while singsonging " Vanilla, Chocolate,Vanilla , Chocolate...."
A while later, Grandma comes back with a couple of hotdogs in her hands.
"Grandma ! what did you take ??? "
"Look Grandpa, I took two ketchup hot-dogs !"
"Grandma... I told you to write it down ! I knew you'd forget the mustard !"
" Grandma..... I told you to write it down! I knew you'd forget the mustard. "
Cruisin Paul
Way to go on selling your house. I'll keep my fingers crossed that everything goes well.
ReplyDeleteWe had a wonderful weekend out on our boat and joined some friends. There were lots of folks out and our favorite restaurant was open. Lots of rules to dine, but it was worth it.
Love all the funnies.
Have a fabulous day and week, Paul. 😎
I'm so happy for you & Zane. You're back on your yacht and with your friends. Whoopee.
DeleteCongratulation on the offer. That sure seemed to go fast.
ReplyDeleteWe're happy but we have to wait until Friday then I can rest.
DeleteWell now I can't wait for Friday - we will celebrate!!! Have a wonderful Tuesday!
ReplyDeletePeg, we all will celebrate on Friday.
DeleteThat's great to hear! Now you can relax. Will the new home be ready just as fast? Take care and will be celebrating in spirit with you on Friday.
ReplyDeleteI still have to wait until Friday and then I can smile.
DeleteGood to hear about the offer. Let's celebrate on Friday! Anyway keep smiling. Thanks for the funnies. Take care and stay safe.
ReplyDeleteYes Nancy, we will celebrate on Friday if everything works out. Thanks.
DeleteCruisin Paul
Oh, hooray for the offer on the house! You will be in my prayers that it all goes well and the move is as easy as any move can be.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mimi. Here we go.
Delete