Another Snowy Sunday

No sun this morning but a lot of snow. I use to enjoy snow but after last year I'm learning to hate the fluffy white blanket of snow on the ground. I wanted to write something different but I'm a Catholic .
Yesterday morning my grandson, Cole & I made meatballs. He did such a great job and boy was he impressed. Of course we had spaghetti & meatballs for dinner and he ate three of them. Later after dinner Mary Lou took Emily & Cole back home. What a wonderful Saturday we all had. 
Tonight Al & Meilin are coming over and after I plan on watching the Academy Awards. AmyLynn went to see the " American Sniper " and she told that it was a great picture. She was so happy that she went to see it. 

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Sunday's Funnies

Old Man

An 80 year old man went to Hollywood to pick up a prostitute and get some action. He noticed one hooker in particular and started flirting with her. The prostitute started becoming annoyed and said, "Get lost old man! You're ruining business!"

"Sure would like to get some action tonight," said the old man.

"You've got to be kidding! You're too old! You're all finished."

"What did you say?" asked the old man.

"You heard me - you're all finished."

"Oh," replied the old man, "how much do I owe you?" 

$5

Clinton is out jogging around in some of the seedier areas of Washington D.C. He notices a good looking prostitute. She sees this and calls out: "Fifty dollars!" He is tempted, but the price is a little high. So he calls back: "Five!" She is disappointed and turns away and Bill continues his jog.

A few days later, he finds himself jogging in the same area and as luck would have it, the prostitute is still there. But she want not come down on her price. "Fifty!" she shouts and Bill answers her: "Five!" No sale.

About a week later, Hillary has decided that she wants to get into shape so she demands to go jogging with Bill. They get to the seedy part of town and the same prostitute is still there. She eyes Bill and Hillary together and yells: "See what you get for five dollars!"  

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Past Cruise Photo

 

                    This where Mary Lou & I went to the Famous Mountain Top at St. Thomas.

To end my blog today I have some funny pictures that you might like to see. Enjoy.

Have a great Sunday. See ya.

Snowy Saturday

This is a photo of my wonderful neighbor Ron, who always tales care of me when there is a great deal of snow. Without him, I wouldn't know how to get all that snow out of my driveway. My golfing friend, Gerry also helps with his machine. Between the two of them they get me out of tough situations during the winter time.Thanks guys.
Today there's not much going on. Al & Meilin can't come over tonight since they are going to a party about the Chinese New Year. Usually Al would come over and play some pool. I guess it will be just Mary Lou & I tonight.

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Saturday's Funnies

Thinking About Things

Little Billy is eating breakfast one morning and gets to thinking about things.

Mommy, mommy, why does dad have so few hairs on his head?” he asks his mother.

“He thinks a lot,” replies his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with such a quick answer to Little Billy’s question.

Or she is until Billy thinks for a second and asks, “So why do you have so much hair?”

 Two mates at a pub having a beer when the bald one

starts complaining about being bald. The other guy says to have a

transplant operation. The bald guy says he can't afford it,so his mate
says to
go and have some rabbits tattooed on his head. The bald guy
says how
will that help? His mate says well from a distance they
will look like

HARES. Get it.

A little girl climbed into her grandfather’s lap and studied his white, balding head. She ran her fingers along the deep wrinkles and road mapped his face and neck. “Did God make you?”, she asked. “Yes” he answered. “Did God make me, to?” she wondered. “Yes”, he replied. “Well, she shrugged, “don’t you think he’s doing a better job now than he used to?

                                   That's me with my lovely wife and I'm bald and loving it.

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Past Cruise Photos

  This is the Carnival Legend, our first ship on our first cruise.

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Well that's about it for today. I think I'll shovel some snow because there 's not that much there now. Have a wonderful Saturday everyone. See ya.

 

Very Cold Thursday

Yes, it's very cold around here and the weathermen are stating that this weekend  we'll be receiving a lot of snow. At least we're not Boston. Those poor people. What is going to happen when it starts thawing? 
Yes, I went to Costco and the bill was, well I will only say that thank God my wife paid for it. The entire afternoon was putting meat, chicken & fish in little containers and placing them in the freezer. I was so tired after that. The only thing that I did last night was playing some pool with Mary Lou. 
 Today is my lunch time with my cousin Dan. We always go to McDonald.
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Thursday's Funnies

A woman goes to her doctor who verifies that she is pregnant. This is her first pregnancy. The doctor asks her if she has any questions. She replies, "Well, I'm a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?"
The doctor answered, "Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it's difficult to describe pain."
"I know, but can't you give me some idea?" she asks.
"Grab your upper lip and pull it out a little..."
"Like this?"
"A little more..."
"Like this?"
"No. A little more..."
"Like this?"
"Yes. Does that hurt?"
"A little bit."
"Now stretch it over your head!"

A woman goes to her doctor complaining that she is exhausted all the time. After the diagnostic tests showed nothing, the doctor gets around to asking her how often she has intercourse.
"Every Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday," she says.
The doctor advises her to cut out Wednesday.
"I can't," says the woman. "That's the only night I'm home with my husband."

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Past Cruise Photo

              Mary Lou is with here friend, Senor Frog outside a restaurant in San Juan, PR

                Same location was this small car for Senor Frog in San Juan, PR

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That's it for now. I now have to do something for my wife. She asked me to help her with the computer and when she asks me for assistance, I do so because she always helps me when I need help and that is usaully often. Have a wonderful Thursday. See ya.



 

Caring Tuesday

I love Maxine and her words of wisdom. Like today. I have to go to the lawyer again and after that the bank and it all pertains to my mother's estate. Yuk! I just want to explode at times but I think that others have a worse day so I think like Maxine and spill my coffee on someone else and that makes me feel better. Ha,ha,ha. 

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Tuesday's Funnies

Gassy Granny

An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas. Fortunately, the farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 10 times since I've been here, and I bet you didn't even notice!"
The doctor says, "I see. Take these pills and come back next week."
The next week the old lady returns. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my silent farts stink like the dickens."
The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."

Gynecological Echo

A woman goes to the gynecologist for an exam. She puts her feet into the stirrups and the doctor begins his exam.

After a moment, he says, "You have an unusually deep vagina."

The woman replies, "You don't have to say it twice."

The doctor says, "I didn't."

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Past Cruise Photo

 
This is Bee with her daughter and son on the Carnival Breeze 2013 on John Healds Blogger's Cruise.

This next thing is just for Bee herself. You see, I was always big and I had reached 235 lbs and if I hadn't lost weight I think there was deadly consequences for me. Bee in her wisdom was losing her weight and she helped me lose my weight. Thanks Bee.

 
That's it for today. See ya.

One Of Those Monday's

Welcome to my world of snow and now we have dangerous temperatures in our lives. That's what we get with living in the Great Lakes area. At least we aren't living in the Boston area. Those poor people are living in hell and it's not hot. 
Yesterday was a very quiet day, not really going on but at least I was able to watch golf. Today, I'm not sure what's ahead for us. Mary Lou did inform me that we have to go Costco soon because we are down to almost nothing with the meat & fish so probably Tuesday will be the day or Wednesday.

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Monday's Funnies

A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. "What are these matches and lighter fluid doing in your car?" asks the cop. "I'm a juggler and I juggle flaming torches in my act." "Oh yeah?" says the doubtful cop. "Lets see you do it." The juggler gets out and starts juggling the blazing torches masterfully.

A couple driving by slows down to watch. "Wow," says the driver to his wife. "I'm glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they're giving now!

 

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Mr. Bradley and his wife have moved to a new apartment in a new building on the 11th floor. The building wasn't yet completed since the elevator wasn't yet installed. So they had to take up the furniture through the emergency stairway. With difficulties and sweat, and by the end of the day, they managed to complete the task. Mrs. Bradley wanted to do laundry so she asked Mr. Bradley to be a good boy and go down to Mr. Peabody's new store and buy her soap detergent. Mr. Bradley went down the stairway from the 11th. floor and entered Mr. Peabody's new store.

Mr. Bradley : "Hello Mr. Peabody. I would like some soap detergent for my wife."

Mr. Peabody : "What brand name is your washer machine?"

Mr. Bradley : "Why??.. I don't know ... Why? "

Mr. Peabody : " I can't sell you soap detergent unless you told me the make of your washer machine. I have a store to run and I care about its reputation Mr. Bradley.

Mr. Peabody continued to refuse to sell Mr. Bradley soap detergent unless he told him the make of his washer machine.

So Mr. Bradley became very angry and had to leave and go all the way back up the stairway to get what Mr. Peabody wanted. When he found out the brand of his washer machine, he went back all the way down and told Mr. Peabody the his washer machine's make was (GENERAL ELECTRIC).

Mr. Peabody : " What's the voltage. Is it 110 or 220 volts?"
Mr. Bradley : " I don't know and I don't care! ... Just sell me the stupid detergent!!!!..."

Mr. Peabody : " I can't.. I just can't risk the reputation of my new store. You have told tell me the voltage of your washer machine."

So angrily... Mr. Bradley had to go all the way back up to find out the voltage. As he was going down the stairway, sweating like a dog, he met one of his neighbors, Sam. Sam was naked waist down, and very angry, carrying a toilet seat and going down the stairs also sweating like a dog.

Mr. Bradley : " SAM.... what in the world is going on? why are you naked waist down and carrying a toilet seat?"

Sam : " Leave me alone Mr. Bradley... I'm very angry right now and don't feel like answering." Mr. Bradley kept insisting on Sam to tell him, but Sam kept quite and was getting angrier until they both entered Mr. Peabody's store.

Sam quickly went in, very angry and stood in the middle of the store and yelled as loud as he could saying : " Well Mr. Peabody.... Here's my toilet seat and also here's my ass... NOW.... WOULD YOU PLEASE SELL ME MY TOILET PAPER??

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Past Cruise Photos

            Mary Lou sitting on a cow cruising on the Carnival Dream at Cosumel, Mexico

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Well that's it for today. I'll be tomorrow with more of the same goodies for you. See ya until then.

Freezing Sunday

 The Beauty of the Caribbean

Good morning friends. Last night we spent 2 hours in a cold arena watching our wonderful grandchildren skating. Cole just started skating and wow, can he skate. OK, he fell a few times but he got up and went again and towards the end of the evening, he was moving very fast and wasn't falling anymore. Emily had skated before and she was moving as a pro until this rude kid skated in front of her and made her fall. Of course her mother & father discussed this with the rude kid. Late he must have realized his mistake and went up to Emily and my daughter and apologized. It was cold in the arena but it was worse outside. It was below temps and vicious wind which only made the cold even worse. Back at home I put the firseplace on and just enjoyed the rest of the evening.

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Sunday's Funnies

A Woman's Poem

He didn't like the casserole
And he didn't like my cake,
He said my biscuits were too hard
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't perk the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and
smacked him one
Like his mother used to do.

The Chastity Belt

In days of old, when knights were bold, this particular knight was leaving for a crusade and called one of his squires: "I'm leaving for the crusade. Here is the key to my wife's chastity belt. If, in 10 years, I haven't returned, you may use the key as I'm sure she will have needs."
The knight sets out on the dusty road, armoured from head to toe. He takes one last look at his castle and sees the squire rushing across the drawbridge, yelling, "Stop! Stop! Thank goodness I was able to catch you. This is the wrong key."

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Past Cruise Photo

Carnival Freddie

You know, the sun is very bright this morning but oh my goodness, it is so cold. I think I'll stay inside today & watch golf on my 70 inch TV. Have a wonderful Sunday friends. See ya.

" Happy Valentines "

Well last night the temp went down to -8 degrees and when I woke up there was a brand new vlanket of snow. How lovely!
Last night Al & Meilin were over. Our usual night, pool and tea with goodies, my goodies. I made 36 cupcakes half red velvet and the rest chocolate. Mary Lou found these heart boxes and she put 4 cupcakes each to give to Emily & Cole for Valentine's. Tonight we are going to see them skate. They wanted the grandparents to see what they could do.

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Saturday's Funnies

50 Shades of Grey 

Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years. Two days before the group is to leave, Ron's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.
Ron's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do. Two days later the three mates get to the camping site only to find Ron sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and dinner cooking on the fire.
"Shit Ron, how long you been here? How did you talk your missus into letting you go?"
"Well, I've been here since last night. After dinner at home yesterday evening, I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and said, 'Guess who?'
I pulled her hands off, and she was wearing sexy brand new lingerie. She said she had been reading 'Fifty Shades of Grey' and she had a devilish look in her eyes!!!
She took my hand and led me to our bedroom. The room had candles and rose petals all over.
On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes!
She told me to tie her up and cuff her to the bed, so I did.
And then she said, 'Do whatever you want.'
So . . . . here I am!"

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Past Cruise Photos

                                             Witchdoctor while we at the port of Antigua.

Have a wonderful Valentine's everyone. See ya later.