Friday, July 17, 2015

Very Wet Friday

It rained all night long, no thunder & Lightning, just rain and it dark this morning and cool. But this weekend it will be hot, hot, hot for a change. They say it will be 89 and 90 degrees for the weekend. 
After my post I going with Al to have a coffee at McDonald's. Today, I'm not sure what's going on later in the day. We'll see
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 Farting All The Time

  Doctor, "What seems to be the problem?"

Patient, "Doc, I've got the farts. I mean I fart all the time,"

The Doctor nods, "Hmm."

Patient, "My farts do not stink and you can't hear them. It's just that I fart all the time. Look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five times. You didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you?"
"Hmm," says the Doctor,

He picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.

The patient is thrilled "Great doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?"

"No," sighs the Doctor, "The prescription is to clear your sinuses. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test."


DOC CURES RARE DISORDER

A man goes to visit his doctor,
"Doc, I've got a rather embarrassing problem, my farts just don't sound right,"
"Well how do they sound?" enquire's the doctor.
"They make a HONDA sound"
The doctor looks puzzled, "Hmm, is there anything else I should know?"
"Well I also have a terrible boil on my arse," replies the man
The doctor looks pleased, "That's it then. We'll lance that boil and you'll see a difference immediately,"
"Why's that then, Doc?" asks the man
"It's well known," laughs the Doctor, "Abscess makes the fart go Honda."

          

An Old Fart


A family brings their elderly mother to a nursing home. While sitting in her new room, she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately straighten her up. After a while, she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back to put her upright. This goes on all morning.
Later, the family arrives and asks, "Are they treating you all right?" She replies, "It's pretty nice -- except they won't let you fart."

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Past Cruise Photos













    Carnival's New Ship the Carnival Vista

            I took this photo after I had walked out of the ship preparing to walk around St. Maarten

    I took this photo out of my balcony on my first cruise on the Carnival Legend. All you can see for miles and miles is water. It was quite a sight for a person who had never been on the ocean.
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That's it, I done for the day. Time for a coffee with Al. Have a wonderful Friday friends.

                                                                              SEE YA.


4 comments:

  1. Boys of all ages love farting jokes! Good ones.

    Have a fab Friday. Big hugs, honey...

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  2. We're going on a cruise to Pittsburg today and it's going ton be hot this weekend. We're used to hot though.

    Lots of farting today. Funny stuff.

    Have a fabulous day and weekend my friend. ☺

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  3. Paul, thank you for all the funny farting jokes. That is a nice poem! Have a beautiful weekend!

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  4. Paul, your photos are gorgeous and the fart jokes are hilarious! LOL!

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Thanks for commenting!