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Sunday's Funnies
Overcrowded church
One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons.
The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!"
Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the assistant pastor.
After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The preacher was holding steady in the pulpit.
The men put their weapons away and said, gently, to the preacher, "All right, pastor, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the service."
Why Eve was created
10. God was worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions.
9. God knew that one day Adam would require someone to locate and hand him the remote.
8. God knew Adam would never go out and buy himself a new fig leaf when his wore out and would therefore need Eve to buy one for him.
7. God knew Adam would never be able to make a doctor's, dentist, or haircut appointment for himself.
6. God knew Adam would never remember which night to put the garbage on the curb.
5. God knew if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle the pain and discomfort of childbearing.
4. As the Keeper of the Garden, Adam would never remember where he left his tools.
3. Apparently, Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden.
2. As the Bible says, It is not good for man to be alone!
And the #1 reason why God created Eve...
1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched his head, and said, "I can do better than that!"
A very faithful woman
Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain't no Lord!!"
Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for GOD to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted "PRAISE THE LORD. GOD I NEED FOOD!! I AM HAVING A HARD TIME. PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!"
The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "PRAISE THE LORD."
The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't."
The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "PRAISE THE LORD. He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord!"
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Past Cruise Photos
On the Lido deck where we could have our lunch, the workers would place some fancy designs with the food.
Uncle Marty our conductor on the train and on the bus in Panama. The train took us from Colon to Panama City to the Pacific and back.
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Have a beautiful Sunday friends. I can't wait for dinner, Chinese food which I enjoy and of course a piece of birthday cake ( Mary Lou's birthday is on Tuesday ) See ya.
♪♪Happy Birthday to you,♪♪
ReplyDelete♪♪Happy Birthday to you,♪♪
♪♪Happy Birthday Dear Mary Lou,♪♪
♪♪Happy Birthday to you.♪♪
Oh boy the car is out of the garage. I know you're a happy guy.
Loved all the jokes and I linked you to Silly Sunday again this week.
Have a fabulous day my friend. ☺
Hi Sandee. Yes the Camero's coming out tomorrow morning. Zoom,zoom. See ya.
DeleteCruisin Paul
Happy, happy birthday to Mary Lou! Enjoy your outing.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs from WPB, honey...
We had a wonderful dinner with my daughter's family and their gift to their mother was a set of pots and pans. Guess who the chef is? ha,ha,ha. See ya.
DeleteCruisin Paul
A very happy birthday to Mary Lou from me too :-)
ReplyDeleteYour jokes made me laugh haha! & I loved that fancy food design, how clever is that :-)
Have a tanfastic week Paul
PS: I think I will get a T Shirt like his seems a good idea heheh!
Hi Stevebethere. There are many different designs made out of food. It's amazing what these man & women can do with food. The t - shirt is funny I agree. See ya.
DeleteCruisin Paul
Hello and thanx for visiting my blog :) I can't wait to read more about your trip. See you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the smiles, and have a blessed and beautiful Holy Week!
ReplyDelete