Friday, May 8, 2015

Another Beautiful Sunny Friday

Wonderful sunny Friday morning to you all. I've got my cup of McDonald's coffee so I'm raring to go. Yesterday I had my friend Sean, my computer whiz, check out my entire computer since I had situation the day before that and this voice stated that there was a virus now violating my computer along with this siren. It scared the heck out of me but he said everything was fine. He cleaned out any problems that were in my computer. I'm relaxed on that. Today we have a man form Re - Bath checking on my shower. I need new things put in to assist me when take my shower so that I don't fall.





Friday's Funnies

              On the night of their honeymoon, a newlywed couple has an unfortunate accident, resulting in the amputation of the groom's left foot. Unable to control her grief, the bride calls her mother from the hospital. "Mother," she sobs, "my husband has only one foot." The mother, trying to console her daughter, says, "That's alright dear, your father has only six inches."

 A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?" The mourner took a moment to collect himself and replied, "My wife's first husband."

Mirror, Mirror

A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says, "Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bust-line forty-four."

Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions. Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return.

This time the husband crossed his fingers and says, "Mirror, mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor."

Again, there is a bright flash and..........both his legs fall off. 

Two Men in a LifeBoat
Two men were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freight vessel. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, one of the men stumbled across an old lamp.

Secretly hoping that a Genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, one did come forth. This particular Genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three.

Without giving much thought to the matter the man blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into beer!" Immediately the Genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals.

Simultaneously, the Genie vanished to his freedom. Only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances. The other man looked disgustedly at the one whose wish had been granted.

After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat." 


Friday's Poetry


Past Cruise Photos

          I took this photo while in Grand Turk. I have no idea what it means except it's interesting.

    While waiting for our excursion to begin , I took a photo of the Norwegian Sun which was docked behind us.


I have to go downtown and buy an artificial flower to bring to the mausoleum to place it with the other flowers that I've already placed next to the crypt of my mother. I'll be there on Mother's Day early Sunday. That's it for today my friends. Enjoy your day and as I always say............................

                                                                            SEE YA.


  1. I'm glad you're having some great weather. That rocks.

    Loved all the jokes and I stole one that will post next Thursday. I gave you credit as always.

    Have a fabulous day my friend. ☺

  2. Love the whale stuck in the sand sculpture.

    I had a similar scary computer message yesterday on my laptop. I'm taking it in on Monday and hope I turn out as well as you did. I'm encouraged after reading this post.

  3. LMAO @ the credit card joke and the others.

    Coincidence with the PC I was fixing a friends PC remotely and also found a virus, their so easy to get these days even when your extra careful.

    Hope you get your shower adjusted to your means it will make a lot of difference.

    I liked both photos and yes that first one is definitely interesting :-)

    Have a tanfastical weekend Paul :-)

    PS: Weather update for London......dreary LOL

  4. Lovely photos, Paul, and thank you so much for the inspiration and laughs. I laughed out loud at the Noah and the termites one. :)

  5. So busy nowadays, but your blogposts makes me relax, so I need to be here:)

  6. My next husband...hahaha.

    Have a great day. Big hugs, honey...


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