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Friday's Funnies
Well Organized Life
Two senior ladies met for the first time since graduating from high
school. One asked the other, "You were always so organized in school,
did you manage to live a well planned life?"
"Oh yes," said her friend. "My first marriage was to a millionaire; my second marriage was to an actor; ,my third marriage was to a preacher; and now I'm married to an undertaker."
Her friend asked, "What do those marriages have to do with a well planned life?"
"One for the money, two for the show. three to get ready and four to go."
Friday's Poetry
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Past Cruise Photos
At the stern of the Carnival Dream pool.
St. Maarten
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Well I did well this morning. Did everything quickly, had my coffee and I'm ready to go to the barber shop. Have a great Friday everyone.
SEE YA.
"Oh yes," said her friend. "My first marriage was to a millionaire; my second marriage was to an actor; ,my third marriage was to a preacher; and now I'm married to an undertaker."
Her friend asked, "What do those marriages have to do with a well planned life?"
"One for the money, two for the show. three to get ready and four to go."
Picking Vegetables
Two elderly ladies meet at the launderette after not seeing one another
for some time. After inquiring about each other's health, one asked how
the other's husband was doing.
"Oh! Ted died last week. He went out to the garden to dig up a cabbage for dinner, had a heart attack and dropped down dead right there in the middle of the vegetable patch!"
"Oh dear! I'm very sorry," replied her friend, "What did you do?"
"Opened a can of peas instead."
Ethel noticed something funny about Mable's ear and said,
"Mable, did you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?"
Mable answered, "I have? A suppository?"
She pulled it out and stared at it.
Then she said, "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing.
Now I think I know where my hearing aid is."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Oh! Ted died last week. He went out to the garden to dig up a cabbage for dinner, had a heart attack and dropped down dead right there in the middle of the vegetable patch!"
"Oh dear! I'm very sorry," replied her friend, "What did you do?"
"Opened a can of peas instead."
Suppository
Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning.Ethel noticed something funny about Mable's ear and said,
"Mable, did you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?"
Mable answered, "I have? A suppository?"
She pulled it out and stared at it.
Then she said, "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing.
Now I think I know where my hearing aid is."
Friday's Poetry
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Past Cruise Photos
At the stern of the Carnival Dream pool.
St. Maarten
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Well I did well this morning. Did everything quickly, had my coffee and I'm ready to go to the barber shop. Have a great Friday everyone.
SEE YA.
Bwahahahahahaha on the jokes. Loved them all.
ReplyDeleteWe're off on a cruise around 11 this morning and will return Sunday afternoon.
Have a fabulous day and weekend my friend. :)
Have a great cruise this weekend Sandy. Be careful in the sun.
DeleteWe have something in common I don't drink either heheh!
ReplyDeleteHad to laugh at the jokes I liked the stay secret one haha!
Love the photo of the Carnival Dream Pool :-)
Have a pooltastic weekend Paul :-)
I still miss a cold beer in the summer but realistically, I haven't lost anything with booze.
DeleteWell, I work with the elderly in a nursing home and believe me...there are lots of funny stories to hear there:), but I love them:)
ReplyDeleteMy mother's nursing home was awful. I was fighting with them all the time regarding my mom's treatment. Eventually she just gave up. I miss her a great deal.
DeleteFunny jokes, Paul, and I love your cruise photos! I have never been on a cruise.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait until my next cruise in Jan. 2016.
DeleteNow that's some funny stuff there. I especially like the ele boogie! Boogie on, my friend.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs, honey...