Monday, May 18, 2015

Brilliant Sunshine Monday

Well that before I saw this brilliant sunshine that we have this morning. This Monday is starting great. I hope it continues. We are suppose to have storms later this afternoon. Mary Lou & I are going to pick up some flowers today to place them on our deck and in the front of the garage and area around the place. My wife & daughter put up the gazebo yesterday so now we can set up our deck. AmyLynn is really working hard around the home. She's also still riding her horse at WETRA where Emily rides. 



Monday's Funnies

 Near Death

A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near death experience. During that experience she sees God and asks if this is it.

God says no and explains that she has another 30 years to live. Upon her recovery she decides to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc.

She even has someone come in and change her hair color. She figures since she's got another 30 years she might as well make the most of it. She walks out of the hospital after the last operation and is killed by an ambulance.

She arrives in front of God and complains: "I thought you said I had another 30 years!!

God replies, "Sorry, I didn't recognize you." 

Sex After Death

A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death.

Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all.

After a long life together, the husband was the first to die.

True to his word, he made the first contact:

" Marion ... Marion "

"Is that you, Bob?"

"Yes, I've come back like we agreed."

"That's wonderful! What's it like?"

Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course.

I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times.

Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again.

Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again"

"Oh, Bob are you in Heaven?"

"No...........I'm a rabbit in Arizona

Mother of Six

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections.

One night they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home, and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home Mother of Six?"

His wife, irritated by her husbands lack of discretion shouts back... "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four!" 


Monday's Poetry


Past Cruise Photos

                                                Small street in San Juan, Puerto Rico

                                                            Lido Pool on the Carnival Breeze.


Well friends, that's it for Monday. I hope that your day is wonderful and bright just like the bright sunshine that we have here in Amherstburg. 

                                                                        SEE YA.


  1. I just loved and should remember your first quote.
    Sun shining here today too.!
    Have a happy day Paul!

  2. Great jokes today. Hello Monday!

    Big hugs from rainy nawth Jawjah, honey...

  3. That troll used to be my avatar when I first started blogging. I love that troll.

    I'm glad you've got sunshine. Good for you.

    Loved all the jokes as always.

    We had a very successful weekend and now we're back in our slip at Willow Berm. Heading home sometime this afternoon.

    Have a fabulous day my friend. :)

  4. LOL @ the jokes You Got Male LOL and the poor woman wasn't recognised :-)

    Good to hear the sun is out there could you send some here please heh!

    I like the Lido Pool on the Carnival Breeze. photo :-)

    Have a bloomingtastic day Paul :-)

  5. I love that friendship poem, Paul!


Thanks for commenting!