Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Cool Tuesday


Good wide awake Tuesday friends. We had storms yesterday and therefore today is very cool, around 52 degrees. Not a day to go swimming in your pool. Yesterday was a very good day regarding my dentist but especially with my doctor. He informed me that everything is A OK. With all this rain, my lawn is beautiful but has to be cut at least twice a week, sometimes three. Thats OK, mary Lou loves cutting the lawn as long as I do the cooking. A fair deal I think.

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Tuesday's Funnies


A man who was once a great actor found he had a serious problem, he could no longer remember his lines. After many years of searching, he finally found a theatre where they were willing to give him a chance to shine again.
"This is the most important part of the play," the director said, "and it consists of only one line. You must walk onto the stage carrying a rose. You must hold the rose to your nose with only one finger and your thumb, sniff it deeply, and then recite the line... 'Ah, the sweet aroma of my mistress'."
The actor was thrilled. For the entire day prior to the play he practiced his line, over and over again. Finally, the big day came.
The curtain was raised and the actor walked onto the stage. With the greatest of passion, he delivered his line - "Ah, the sweet aroma of my mistress."
Suddenly, the audience burst into laughter and the director was fuming. "You damn fool!" cried the director. "You've ruined me!"
Bewildered, the actor asked, "What? What happened? I didn't forget my line did I?"
"No, you fool!" the director screamed. "You forgot the bloody rose!"


Our secretary heard this during a talent show at a retirement village.
A retirement village decided to hold a Singles Dance, at which this
very sweet 90-year-old gentleman met a very sweet 90-year-old lady,
and they danced and talked and laughed, and just hit it off great.
They continued to see each other for a while and enjoyed each other
so much, and danced so well together, etc., that they decided to
get married.
On their wedding night, they went to bed and he reached over and took her
hand and squeezed it, and she squeezed his hand back, and they went to
sleep.
On the second night, when they went to bed, he reached over and
squeezed her hand, and she squeezed his hand back, and they went to sleep.
On the third night, he reached over and took her hand, and she said, "Not
tonight, honey, I have a headache."




 A wife asked her husband: ‘What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?’
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: ‘I like your sense of humor!’
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Wife:      ‘You always carry my photo in your wallet..  Why?’
Hubby:  ‘When there is a problem, no matter how great, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.’
Wife:  ‘You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?’
Hubby:  ‘Yes! I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?’
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Wife:           ‘What are you doing?’
Husband:       Nothing.
Wife:           ‘Nothing…?  You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.’
Husband:   ‘I was looking for the expiration date.’

Johnny Has A Sweet Tooth

One fine afternoon a gentleman was walking down the street; and as he came around the corner he spotted a young boy sitting in front of the local candy shop. As he approached, he realized it was his neighbor’s kid – Little Johnny.
The boy was shoving sweet tarts and chocolate bars down his throat as fast as possible, so much that it prompted the man to offer some advice: “You know, Johnny, it’s not healthy to eat all that candy.”
Little Johnny looks up at him and quickly retorts “You know, my grampa lived to be 96 years old.”
“Oh,” the man replied, “did he eat lots of candy?”
“Nope,” retorted Little Johnny, “he minded his own damn business!”
- See more at: http://www.funnyandjokes.com/johnny-has-a-sweet-tooth.html#sthash.2aB04RaF.dpuf


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Tuesday's Poetry
 
 
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Past Cruise Photos
 
                                                                Arriving in Curacao.

                                                           Nearing the pier of Aruba.

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WEll we're the ending of our road for the day. I hope that you've enjoyed our time together. Let's try and do it again tomorrow. As I say.........
 
  

                                                                       SEE YA.
 
 

4 comments:

  1. It's a bit chilly here this morning too. Going to be that way through the weekend. Oh well, I'll take it because it's better than 90 degrees.

    Loved all the jokes. I always do.

    Have a fabulous day my friend. ☺

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  2. Oh my! What a beautiful lawn you have. Here in my place the grass grows so slowly. I just cut them once a week. My cherry tree is not blossoming yet. Everything is late:(
    Thanks for making my day with the funnies and the jokes:)

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  3. Beautiful photos and I love the Dr. Seuss poem, Paul. I laughed when I saw the conversation between the cat and the infant. :)

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  4. A Chance to Shine Again is really funny :) Also I definitely didn't mistake the fahrenheit for Celsius for a moment there (cough cough)

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Thanks for commenting!