Monday, May 4, 2015

Thunderstorm Monday

Good morning all. After having a warm sunny Sunday and getting outside, Monday is going to be having thunderstorms. That's Ok because it will help my beautiful lawn to get better. Yesterday I was outside walking about and it was wonderful. Today I'm not sure what's going to happen. We'll see. I tried to find a restaurant to take my wife out on Mother's Day. I've got a couple of other places to still check on. 

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Monday's Funnies




The “Good Old Days”

This grandmother joke will have you laughing for days…
A grandmother was telling her granddaughter about the “good old days.” “When a gentleman and lady were interested in each other, eventually they would start ‘spooning’.” The young girl asked, “Why did they call it ‘spooning,’ grandma?” And Grandma replied, “I guess because it sounded better than to say we were out ‘forking!’ ”






Grandfather

The young fellow was about to be married and was asking his grandfather about sex. He asked how often you should have it. His grandfather told him that when you first get married, you want it all the time and maybe do it several times a day. Later on, sex tapers off and you have it once a week or so. Then as you get older, you have sex maybe once a month. When you get really old, you are lucky to have it once a year...maybe on your anniversary. The young fellow then asked his grandfather, "Well how about you and Grandma now?"
His grandfather replied, "Oh, we just have oral sex now."
"What's oral sex?" the young fellow asked.
"Well," Grandpa said, "She goes to bed in her bedroom and I go to bed in my bedroom. She yells, 'Screw You', and I holler back, 'Screw You too!'"
 
 


Safe sex

A teenage boy and his grandfather go fishing one day. While fishing, the old man starts talking about how times have changed. The young man picks up on this and starts talking about the various problems and diseases going around.Teen says, "Grandpa, they didn't have a whole lot of problems with all these diseases when you were young did they?" Grandpa replies, "Nope." Teen says, "Well, what did you guys use for safe sex?" Grandpa replies, "A wedding ring."




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Monday's Poem

                                    
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Past Cruise Photos

 I took this photo from the beaches of St. Maarten. Todays cruise ships are big. The ship on the right is my ship. the Carnival Breeze

    For those that enjoy loosing their money, there is a casino on most cruise ships. Me, I'd rather eat & drink.
                   
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                               That's it for me today but as I usually do, there is one more thing.


                                                                             SEE YA.



8 comments:

  1. I am sure you will find a restaurant suitable LOL @ the jokes and especially the low hangers :-)

    Have a swingtastic day :-)

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  2. I hope your ankle is still feeling good. I'm guessing it does since you went on a walk.

    Loved all the jokes.

    I can't stand the casinos on the ship. Filled with cigarette smoke. Awful.

    Have a fabulous day my friend. :)

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  3. Well, getting old can be fun heh:)
    I like best the last quote, but I did laugh today too.
    Mother's day here in Norway is on the second Sunday in February. Enjoy the celebration with your wife:)

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  4. Lol. Laughing at old age is better than crying about it. Growing old beats the alternative.

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  5. Lol. Laughing at old age is better than crying about it. Growing old beats the alternative.

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  6. Great post again, Paul, and the one with the elderly couple about true love especially touched my heart today! Here in Montreal we are possibly going to get some thunderstorms this evening. :)

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  7. Hope that ankle is doing better. Smiles!

    Big hugs, honey...

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  8. Took me forever to figure out the grandfather clock joke and when I did you had me blushing. LOL

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Thanks for commenting!